Okay, it's Monday. It's December 21st, damn it. And the word of the day is crystalism, which means the amniotic tranquility of being indoors during a thunderstorm.

Used in a sentence, a great way to disrupt your state of crystallism is a puzzle in a thunderstorm.

Pro tip, if you pronate your knuckle you can really get

and in international waters all of that is legal.

Ah international waters the girl with a nose ring of law.

I'm no illusions.

I'm Eli Bosnick.

I'm Arts Bachelor Heath and Wright,

and Broadcasting Delayed, from America's far center. We are the

Skeetocrats. On this week's episode, Trump gives a whole new meaning to pardon me.

The Netherlands urged him to at least turn on one factor authentication.

And oatmeal raisin is the Fredo Corleone of cookies.

How dare you?

But first, the rest of the intro music.

Joining me for headlines tonight are my fellow skeptic rats, no illusions in Eli Bosnick.

Gentlemen, it's the most wonderful time of the year,

the end of 2020.

So any words of wisdom for holiday time?

Yes, actually. They're going to pretend to like it no matter what and you're going to think they secretly hate it no matter what.

So stop stressing about what it is that they secretly hate.

Just give him money. Spoken like a man who I got a way better gift than he got me. That's all I'm saying.

No fucking way this year man. All right. All right.

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