I'm Maggie Smith, and this is The Slowdown.

Every summer for the past several years, my children and I have traveled from Ohio to Illinois

to visit a dear friend of mine and her family. We've been friends for 31 years since high school.

It's now an annual tradition to spend time together, all seven of us,

me and my two kids, and my friend, her husband, and their two kids. The trip requires a short

flight or a long drive to Chicago, but it's worth it. Each year when we're all together, I think, I haven't laughed

this hard since we were all together last year. Our two families have so many inside jokes now

that my teenage daughter keeps a list on her phone of what she calls trip lore. We revisit the trip lore now and then during the year.

Months from now, she'll pull out her phone while we're walking the dog or running errands,

and she'll crack me up by reading from the list of hilarious things that happened when we were with our Chicago friends.

We may only be together for less than a week any given year, but the laughter lasts all year long.

And when we see each other again, we pick right up where we left off, as if no time has passed.

What a gift long friendships are, those people who have known multiple iterations of us.

My friends from my teens and 20s have seen me single, married, divorced, and dating again. They've seen me with a short pixie-cut,

waist-length hair, and some unfortunate layers and highlights in the early aughts. They remember

when I was first starting to write poems before I'd published my first book.

That shared history means so much to me that sometimes I get a little melancholy when I make

new friends.

I feel lucky to still be finding kindred spirits at this time in my life, but it's hard not to feel like we've

missed out on a lot. They can't know everyone I've already been, and I can't know everyone

they've already been. Today's poem reads to me like a love poem, a tribute to a long friendship. It reminds me that part of how we know

ourselves is through the people who know us best and to have loved us through our changes.

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