Greetings, you bad motherfuckers.

It's Wednesday, the 5th of fucking January.

The joint is brought to you by stamps.com.

Listen to me, if I got a small business

or there's nothing more valuable than my time,

stamps.com makes it easy to mail and ship right from your computer

so you don't have to waste time and make trips to the fucking post office.

Now you can save time and money with stamps.com.

You can send letters, packages for less,

with discounted rates from USPS, UPS and much more.

My wife's been with stamps.com for over 10 years now.

When it comes to merch, business stuff, shipping stamps.com is number one.

You just put the stuff in the bag,

lift up the little horn on the mailbox,

and the mailman will pick it up since 1998.

Stamps.com has brought you the service of the US Postal Service

and UPS shipping right to your computer.

All you need is a computer and a standard printer.

No special supplies or equipment within minutes.

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package anywhere.

Once the mail is ready, you schedule a pickup.

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