4.8 • 10.9K Ratings
🗓️ 6 October 2020
⏱️ 116 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Today’s episode is all about fear and how it holds us back in all aspects of our life. My guest is psychologist, Dr Pippa Grange, who has been hailed by the media ‘the doctor who helped transform the England football team’. Pippa is also author of the compelling book, Fear Less: How to Win at Life Without Losing Yourself.
Fear is one of our body’s natural early warning systems. It alerts us when we’re under threat and need to take action. A bit like stress or inflammation, it’s something that’s useful to us in certain circumstances. But not when it becomes chronic and disrupts our entire sense of wellbeing. Pippa believes that behind every negative emotion, is the fear that we are not good enough. She sees fear as ‘the constant companion’ in our lives. Whether it manifests as loneliness, jealousy, dissatisfaction, perfectionism, judgement or shame, the root cause is actually the same. We discuss how we can all leave fear behind and gain what Pippa calls ‘mental freedom.’
We delve into how shame evolves in childhood, and how we need to shake out some of the narratives of how we ‘should’ behave. We also talk about how so many of us conform to societal ideals in order to avoid criticism but in so doing, we can strip ourselves of who we really are. In fact, by pretending to be someone else, Pippa believes we are only performing at life, not living it.
We explore the concept of a ‘scarcity mindset’ – the false idea that there’s not enough to go around, whether that be love, success, respect or admiration. We also talk about how schools would be the best place to instil these ideas, and help our children understand that winning and losing are just outcomes and not their worth.
Finally, Pippa explains how by noticing and sitting with our own fears, we can find our real passions and deeper fulfilment. This conversation is full of wisdom and insight and I am sure you are going to really enjoy it!
Show notes available at drchatterjee.com/126
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0:00.0 | There's a poverty and uniformity. So when we try and make everybody cookie cutter the same, |
0:06.2 | when we have this sort of central idea of what good looks like or what enough looks like, |
0:12.4 | and everybody's moving to that middle ground, I think it's just it strips us of the richness of |
0:18.0 | our humaneness, of everything that we are, of the spirit in a way, and for me when we just try |
0:24.9 | and conform to one archetype, one way of being, what a loss because we have to trim off all these |
0:32.2 | slightly untidy edges that are where all the gorgeousness is in people. |
0:37.6 | Hi, my name is Rongan Chasji, welcome to Feel Better Live More. |
0:46.7 | Hey guys, welcome to the podcast. This is episode 126. |
0:54.6 | I've been really excited about releasing this conversation today. I think it is relevant for |
1:00.8 | every single one of us, and it's all about fear, and in particular how fear can hold us back in |
1:07.6 | all aspects of our life. And my guest is the wonderful Dr. Pepper Grange, who the British media |
1:15.1 | have called the doctor who helped transform the England football team. You see, Pepper is a highly |
1:21.7 | sought after psychologist, but she's also the author of one of my very favorite books over the |
1:27.5 | past few years. Fearless, how to win at life without losing yourself. A pepper believe behind |
1:35.5 | every negative emotion is the fear that we are not good enough. She sees fear as the constant |
1:41.6 | companion in our lives. Whether we manifest as loneliness, jealousy, dissatisfaction, perfectionism, |
1:49.1 | judgment or shame, the root cause is actually the same, and we discuss how we can all leave fear |
1:56.3 | behind and gain what pepper calls mental freedom. We discuss shame, where it comes from, and what we |
2:04.1 | can do about it. But we also talk about how many of us try to conform to society's ideals in order |
2:11.6 | to avoid criticism. But in doing so, we can strip ourselves of who we really are. |
2:18.4 | In fact, by pretending to be someone else, Pepper believes we are only performing it life, |
2:23.9 | not living it. We also explore the importance, but under discussed concept of the scarcity mindset, |
... |
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