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The Betrayed, The Addicted, The Expert

#124: Can It Be Betrayal Trauma Even If It's Not Sex Addiction?

The Betrayed, The Addicted, The Expert

Ashlynn Mitchell, Brannon Patrick, Coby Mitchell

Health & Fitness, Education, Mental Health, Sexuality, Self-improvement

4.8 • 1.2K Ratings

🗓️ 28 March 2022

⏱️ 7 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Caller Chelsea: "My husband has used some porn as a form of escapism, but never really an addiction. His real addiction has been alcohol. He is currently 3 months sober, but it seems like his goal in this is to show me that the alcohol was never really the problem in our marriage, but that the real problem was/is me. He makes zero effort to move toward the relationship, giving me the silent treatment. When I force him to talk, or at minimum listen to what I have to say, he refutes most everything I say that I am feeling. I have begged him to go to couples counseling, but he refuses, saying that I don’t really want to resolve anything, I just want a place to be able to level him with anger into compliance with the approval of an “expert”. He won’t make any agreements regarding how we share our time, money, and space. I have restarted individual counseling, and am trying to figure out boundaries, but it is so confusing when we share so much in life."

We're publishing 2 episodes a week on our Real Talk Recovery Podcast Feed (1 per week on BAE feed). You can find those bonus episodes and subscribe to our Real Talk Recovery channel here

We would love to help answer your questions related to sex addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing. Go to realtalkrecovery.com to submit your question.

Tyler Patrick, "The Wandering Therapist", is co-founder of Love Strong (lovestrong.com), a Christian-based Recovery + WHOLEHEARTED living therapy practice. If you'd like to work with Love Strong via telehealth or in-person, reach out to us at [email protected] or go to our website: https://lovestrong.com. We have a great online Foundations Of Recovery Class starting soon. This class is for sex addiction recovery and healing from betrayal trauma. Go to https://lovestrong.com/services/foundations-group/ to learn more and sign up.  

Brannon Patrick, "The Expert", is co-founder of Therapy Utah (therapyutah.org). You can follow Brannon on Instagram @brannon_patrick. He has some really great online courses available at brannonpatrick.com like his Boundary Bootcamp course. Brannon has a program called L.I.F.T. for betrayal trauma and addiction recovery available online starting soon. Go to https://www.liftforrecovery.com/ for more info!  

Join us for one of our "Life-Changing" retreats. therapybros.com/events

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Can it be betrayal trauma even if it's not sex addiction?

0:07.4

Welcome to the Real Talk Recovery Podcast with the Therapy Brothers. We're brothers,

0:11.7

we're therapists, and we know recovery. Bring your stories, your questions, your successes

0:17.6

with real recovery.

0:33.2

Okay Brandon, we've got a really good call around today. It's going to be an interesting discussion.

0:39.5

How to go for you this weekend? What do you mean?

0:43.6

Well, this weekend was nuts. Yeah, what went on this weekend?

0:51.1

Well, I went to a youth conference on Friday night and slept on a concrete floor with 20

0:58.3

boys screaming all night around me. That was awesome. Then I went to ski school with my kids

1:05.8

on Saturday, so I was dead tired from that night. But I got to tell you, I was up in the mountains

1:13.8

at Brighton at night. Snow was good. I mean, it was just so nice. But got home from ski school at 11

1:22.2

o'clock at night and turned around and drove three hours to fair in Utah and spent the day there

1:31.2

to say farewell to our aunt and uncle who are going on a church mission.

1:37.7

And so yeah, got home last night and here we are this morning. So full weekend with no rest over

1:42.6

the weekend. But an awesome weekend. It was really, it was really, really good. So that's great.

1:47.5

Yeah, well, I just wanted to throw a big shout out to Uncle Doug and Aunt Punk and

1:52.0

who live in fair in Utah. Yeah. Yeah. We love them and are really proud of the decisions that

2:01.7

they've decided to do and the examples that they're setting for us to being people who live

2:06.1

with conviction. And so just wanted to throw a shout out to them really quickly before we get started.

2:10.0

Yeah, just an example of humility and and just love in the Lord, right? Love in God. And so yeah,

2:17.5

I appreciate them as well. So all right, should we dive in? Yeah, let's do it. So we've got

2:24.2

we've got Chelsea here with us today and Chelsea, you've got some pretty good questions. Why don't you

...

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