115. “We’ve fought about money for 29 years. Is it time for divorce?”

Money For Couples

Ramit Sethi

Relationships, Society & Culture, Investing, Business

4.6 • 3.1K Ratings

🗓️ 1 August 2023

⏱️ 81 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Kevin and Ebony are both 52. They have two kids, both young adults, and have turned their attention to retirement planning. But standing in the way are $135,000 of debt, a recurring issue, and 29 years of deeply ingrained negative communication patterns when it comes to money. This episode is brought to you by: DeleteMe | If you want to get your personal information removed from the web, go to https://www.joindeleteme.com/ramit for 20% off. Go to https://www.doordash.com and use promo code RAMIT to get 50% off (up to $10) when you spend $15 or more at convenience, grocery or retail stores on DoorDash. Fabric by Gerber Life | Protect your family today with Fabric by Gerber Life. Apply today in just 10 minutes at https://www.meetfabric.com/ramit. Long Angle | If you've made a lot of money and you're looking for a community of peers to turn to for advice, go to https://www.longangle.com to learn more. Links mentioned in this episode • Get my New York Times best-selling book • Get my no-numbers journal • Get Money Coaching with Ramit • Join Dream Job Connect with Ramit • Get the Podcast Newsletter and exclusive Q&A about the show • Download the Conscious Spending Plan • Other episodes • Instagram • Twitter • YouTube • Submit a question for the newsletter iwt.com/askramit If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here. Produced by Crate Media.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Have you heard people talking about the hedonic treadmill, the idea that once you start spending money on certain things
0:06.8	You're not going to enjoy it anymore and then they usually tell you this so therefore don't get on the hedonic treadmill
0:12.9	Don't spend any money if you get a raise bank at all. I don't love that advice. It's just getting people to play small
0:19.3	I would rather you have a philosophy or a framework on how to know when you are ready to spend more in my life
0:28.2	If you told me remit you can't stay at nice hotels
0:31.8	That would actually be very difficult for me because those things are important to me
0:36.2	For a lot of people if they own a house and you say you can't afford it anymore
0:39.9	You've got a rent or move into an apartment. They would find that incredibly difficult
0:44.4	I don't want you to be afraid of the hedonic treadmill and worry about spending money on anything because you're just gonna
0:49.9	Get used to it. So don't do it at all. No, I want you to have a more nuanced perspective on money
0:55.0	That's why this Saturday on my podcast newsletter. I'm going to share six main areas where once you spend money
1:01.6	It's really difficult to go back and my philosophy is to make sure that you are ready
1:07.5	To move up the value chain before you ever spend money on these things
1:11.9	I set my life up so I would never have to take a step back when it comes to nice hotels
1:16.6	I want you to do the same for the important things in your life get on the newsletter at iwt.com slash podcast newsletter
1:24.2	I'm only sending this particular newsletter out on Saturday, August 12th after that you will not be able to access it
1:30.4	Iwt.com slash podcast newsletter
1:36.6	I really was at the point where if he doesn't carry more I don't carry more and I was just gonna throw my hands up and
1:43.8	Walk away and either file bankruptcy or walk away and file the bores. I'm that
1:50.1	Like done. It was not this complicated two months ago for me
1:55.0	What did we stay in this conversation there? We need more money now. Why are we doing this? Why are we he just said more money was not
2:05.7	He changed his direct deposit. I get paid once a month. So I was like paying
	...

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