Welcome to the happiness podcast. I'm Dr. Robert Puff. If we're listening to this

podcast then we're about one thing we're trying to find happiness and make our

lives work well. Well today's question is this. Do you think it's easier for us to find

happiness in the external world or to change ourselves? Which do we have more control over? And if it is ourselves, how do we make changes so that our life goes great?

Because this problem arises all the time,

and this is one of the major reasons that we suffer, that we're not happy

because what we're trying to do is change something that is very challenging to change,

namely the external world.

However, if we focus on ourselves,

there's a lot of change that can happen, and quickly.

So let me start with a simple example.

It's a story that I heard from one of my friends

just last night.

He shared that he went out to dinner and he was with a friend that he hadn't seen in a while,

and service was really poor and it really took away from his enjoyment of the dinner.

But what he discovered was his friend,

just loved it because she was a mom and didn't get out

almost never.

And she just loved being served,

even though the food came a half an hour late.

And for her, it was a wonderful dinner because she didn't have to focus or take care of anyone else.

She could just take her time, relax, enjoy her food. But for my friend it wasn't. And he realized that, hmm, he wasn't

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