college a place young people go to think they're better than me get above their raisin

and receive anti-patriot indoctrination from woke marxist libtard snowflake politically correct

blue-haired baristas studying impractical careers such as underwater basket weaving

which sounds really difficult so no wonder there are so many college courses on the subject.

College used to be a place where our social betters would learn to rule us properly,

but then FDR came along with his GI Bill and ruined everything.

I'd call it a lower GI Bill, you know, to really trigger the woke flakes,

but actually, that's just what the doctor sent me after my colonoscopy last year. Anyway, in the 80s, college even used to

have its own kind of rock, which they played on their college radio stations, which were paid for

with my tax dollars. You know, all the taxes I paid back in my 1980s childhood.

And some of the weird and unnatural music,

these goddamn kids played, got itself an audience.

And then they started calling it alternative rock.

You know, just like their weird and unnatural alternative lifestyles, we call them back then.

Some of those college rock bands even got popular while the 80s were still going on,

like precocious students who showed lots of early promise and were already advanced for their age

and looked like they might actually become successful in life.

And that's who we'll be looking at today.

In this first installment of College Rock Chronicles, a subgenre, I'm going to give the

tidy and compact name of undergrad thesis rock.

Beyond Yon Rock, 2000.

Welcome to Beyond Yadrach 2000.

...