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Feeling Good Podcast | TEAM-CBT - The New Mood Therapy

106: Ask Dr. Helen (and David) — My Husband Doesn't Make me Feel Loved! What Can I Do?

Feeling Good Podcast | TEAM-CBT - The New Mood Therapy

David Burns, MD

Clinical, Therapy, Anxiety, Psychotherapy, Depression, Health & Fitness, Cognitive, Mentalhealth, Mental Health, Behavior, Education, Self-improvement, Psychology, Relationships, Addiction, Happiness, Personalgrowth

4.4856 Ratings

🗓️ 17 September 2018

⏱️ 49 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

This is the second podcast on relationship problems. with Dr. Helen Yeni-Komshian. In today's podcast, we address four questions from listeners like you:

  1. Our marriage lacks intimacy. What can I do? A podcast fan named David explains that his relationship with his wife is no longer intimate; he complains that they only talk about day to day things on a superficial level. David wants to know if he needs to inject some conflict into the relationship to make it more meaningful or exciting.
  2. Why is my wife so critical of me? David wants to know why his wife constantly peppers him and batters him with critical questions, and what he can about it.
  3. Why is my friend so critical and dogmatic? Rajesh describes a friend who argues endlessly and accuses Rajesh of being irritating. His friend says, "Anyone would be upset when they try to talk to you!" What's up? Why is this happening? Who's really to blame?
  4. Adarah feels lonely and tells her husband what he can do to make her feel loved--but it just doesn't seem to work! Why? And what CAN she do to improve her marriage?

I think you will enjoy the lively dialogue between Fabrice, Helen and myself and see us struggling and making some mistakes, too, when we try to model more effective responses based on the Five Secrets of Effective Communication! We also stress, once again, the importance of Interpersonal Decision-Making any time you run into a conflict with a friend, colleague, or loved one.

For more information on healing troubled relationships, you can read my book, Feeling Good Together, which is available as a paperback on Amazon. In addition, you can listen to our previous podcasts on the Five Secrets of Effective Communication, beginning with Podcast #65 (Enjoy Greater Intimacy) and several of the podcasts that follow.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hello and welcome to the Feeling Good podcast.

0:12.4

I am your host, Fabrice Nye.

0:14.7

And joining me here in the Murrieta Studios is Dr. David Burns.

0:19.0

Hi, David.

0:20.0

Hi, Fabrice.

0:23.8

Dr. David Burns has been a pioneer in the development of cognitive therapy, and he is the creator of the new team therapy. He is the author of

0:30.2

Feeling Good, which has sold over 5 million copies in the United States, and has been translated into

0:35.5

over 20 languages.

0:43.0

He is an emeritus adjunct clinical professor of psychiatry at the Stanford University School of Medicine.

0:44.0

Welcome to episode 106 of the Feeling Good podcast, and we are continuing with Ask Helen and

0:52.6

David for the five secrets, lots of questions that our listeners sent to us.

1:00.3

So without further ado, let's move on to the next question. This is part two of this Ask Helen.

1:08.5

Okay, two quick announcements. I'll be very fast. For therapists who are

1:14.5

listening, there's some upcoming workshops that you might be interested in. One I'm doing

1:19.9

with Dr. Jill Levitt on October 28, 2018. That's Sunday. It's a full day program program on team CBT methods for the treatment of relationship difficulties.

1:32.3

And that'll be from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. Pacific Standard Time. You can come in person. We have a limited seating in Palo Alto, or we have many more available slots online.

1:45.0

You can join online and watch it in real time.

1:49.0

And there will be breakout groups and practice sessions also for those of you who join online.

1:56.0

If you're interested in team CBT methods for the treatment of relationship difficulties,

2:01.6

you can go to the www.fillinggoodinstitute.com,

2:08.6

feeling good institute.com or simply call the feeling good institute at 650-353,

2:15.6

6544. The cost is $135.35. There will be six continuing education credits.

...

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