We said that it was Earmuff Day, but it's also smart and sexy day.

Oh.

I am neither of those.

Well, I can teach you how.

The men's room top ten.

I know you can, brother.

Yeah.

The men's room top ten!

Ten ways to be sexy at any age.

You've come to the right person.

Let's say you're looking to attract a sugar daddy.

Park yourself at an upscale hotel bar.

Wear something slinky and form fitting.

Don't forget to show off what the good lord gave you.

Push those sweater puppies up and out. Don't forget to show off what the good Lord gave you. Push those sweater puppies up and out.

Don't be shy.

Let some wine dribble out of the corner of your mouth

and cascade down your neck to the promised land.

And when they come running, and they will,

you tell them you're a very personal assistant,

and you have daddy issues.

Works every time.

...