#046: You Had Me At Howdy

The Shallow End

John Elliott and Lindsay Schnebly

Society & Culture, Comedy, History

4.9 • 612 Ratings

🗓️ 12 April 2023

⏱️ 28 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

On the latest episode of The Shallow End, we bring you two completely different yet equally hilarious stories. First up, get ready to be inspired by the heroic tale of a modern-day cowboy who saved the day at an Oregon Walmart. You won't believe the lengths he went to protect innocent bystanders from harm. And if that's not enough to pique your interest, we also have the hilarious and unbelievable story of Keith - the man who has been arrested so many times that even the cops are struggling to keep track! We'll share some of the wildest details from Keith's incredible rap sheet, and you won't want to miss a second of it. So tune in and get ready to be entertained, inspired, and maybe even a little bit shocked. This is one episode you won't forget anytime soon! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	It began long ago, two young boys in an American town riding their bikes to school and Little League practice.
0:09.0	Over the years, the boys became fast friends, united in their love for stories where things would go horribly wrong.
0:18.0	Pour yourself a strong beverage and buckle up. You're in the shallow end with
0:23.6	Schnebly and Toff. So, J.G., as we start episode number 46, I just want to explain why I might look
0:31.7	a little happier than normal today. Is it because you're getting a haircut? Oh, you bastard. You gave it away. I am so excited to
0:41.9	get a haircut. I get it cut every three weeks. Every three weeks. Every three weeks. The stylist who
0:47.4	cuts my hair is a woman named Kathy with a K. And I have journeyed for decades to find somebody who is this good and no wasted strokes.
0:59.6	And boom, boom, boom, you're in, you're out.
1:01.5	And I always drive home with the stupidest grin on my face.
1:05.1	And I come into the door and say to Nancy, I got my haircut.
1:08.6	I'm happy.
1:09.6	It's funny.
1:10.4	I was just guessing that you were getting
1:12.4	a haircut simply based on a conversation that we had had earlier about how much you love getting
1:18.4	your haircut. I hate it. It's just, it's something I have to do. You know what's even better than
1:24.6	that? What? Getting your haircut and then going to Costco.
1:29.0	Yes.
1:30.0	You talk about Happy Place with Happy Place.
1:32.5	You like to buy goods in bulk, neatly shorn.
1:36.0	Non-hearsuit.
1:36.8	I don't like getting my haircut, and it stems from one experience I had.
1:43.5	I was on vacation, and I tend to go to the same person
	...

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