In this episode, you'll learn: Why you keep falling back into old patterns (and the weird brain science behind breaking free) The real reason most people fail when trying to change themselves How to tell if your personality traits are helping you grow or just keeping you safe and stuck    What if everything you believe about your personality is just an elaborate story you've been telling yourself? You know where these stories come from, right? That voice in your head. You know the one. It's got you totally convinced about who you are. "I'm just not good with money." "I'll always be anxious." "This is just my personality." But here's the thing about personalities. They're not set in stone. They're more like stories we tell ourselves over and over until we believe them. And trust me, our brains are really good at finding evidence to support whatever story we're telling. Think about it. Every time you react to something, your brain is basically taking notes. "Oh, this is how we handle stress. Got it. Filing that away for next time." Before you know it, you've got these deep grooves in your brain. Like a record that keeps playing the same song because that's where the needle naturally falls. Here's where it gets good though. Science is showing us something pretty wild: these grooves in our brain? They're not permanent. Every single experience you have is literally rewiring your brain. Creating new pathways. New possibilities. Today our guest is Olga Khazan, staff writer at The Atlantic and author of "Me, But Better." She's done the research, run the experiments, and found out what it really takes to change who you are. Not just on the surface, but at your core. Links from the episode: Show Notes: mindlove.com/389 Join the Mind Love Collective Sign up for The Morning Mind Love for short daily notes to wake up inspired Support Mind Love Sponsors Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices