My only experience in live birth was in college.

College?

Yeah, yeah.

Wait.

Was it a video you watched?

No, no, no, wait.

Actually, you might not know this story.

Okay.

Okay, so sophomore year, my friend Jared, who I was living with at the time, we had a studio dorm room together.

Yeah.

Adopted a cat.

But we lived literally right across the hallway from our RA.

So he gets this cat.

He didn't find a cat and then bring it home.

He like actually set out to adopt a cat.

One of his teachers found the cat and and he would, like, took the cat. Oh, okay. Which feels irresponsible on the professor's part now that I think about it, but in any case. Yeah, these are college kids. So he names the cat Miss Kitty because our room wasn't gay enough yet. Amazing. And we have the cat for, like, a month or two. And he's like, oh, Miss Kitty's gaining weight. And then he's like, I think Miss Kitty's pregnant. And I was like, why? And he's like pointed at her belly and her belly was like moving like like alien. No. Oh, God. Gross. And she was obviously a little standoffish as many like half like, half feral cats are. Fair enough. And then, like, I remember one night.

The professor gave a student, a fully pregnant, half feral cat. I thought it was going to be a kitten. I thought it was going to be like, here's a little kitten that my cat gave birth to seven kittens and I need to keep them away. We're in bed. We're doing homework. And Miss Kitty like jumps onto Jared's bed and she climbs under the blankets. And he's like, oh my God, this is so great. Like she's finally starting to bond. This cat lets out this unholy sound. And Jared is like, holy shit. Her water breaks or whatever happens to a cat, if it

doesn't, that doesn't happen to a cat, breaks in the bed.

His bed is soaked.

Oh, gross.

He jumps over to his computer and just slams on music to cover the noises that she's making

so the RA can't hear.

...