Hey, this is Brett. We're taking a break from new episodes for the holidays, but re-broadcasting

episode number 657. Why you don't change, but how you still can. With Dr. Ross Elinhardt.

It's a great episode to listen to as you're thinking about the changes you want to make

in your life in 2023. We'll see you next Monday in 2023 with a brand new episode. Happy

New Year.

Brett McKay here and welcome to another edition of the Art of Manliness Podcast. Anyone

who's ever tried to lose weight, curb their temper, quit smoking, or alter any of their

habit in their lives knows that personal change is hard. Really hard. Most self-help books

out there treat people like machines, blitzing past this difficulty, and offering mechanical

ficed-up formulas for changing your life. My guest-day says such simplified solutions

hugely miss the mark. He argues that if you ever want to change, it's more fruitful to understand

why you don't, and figure out why you do. To understand that, you've got to go deeper.

His name is Dr. Ross Elinhardt, and he spent his career facilitating the recovery of individuals

diagnosed with psychiatric and substance abuse issues. In his latest book, How We Change

and Ten Reasons Why We Don't, he's taken what he's learned in his work and applied it

to anyone trying to change their lives. Ross and I begin our conversation with some of

the reasons we don't change, including the existential pressure of feeling like you're

solely in charge of making change happen, a dizzying amount of freedom and number of

options for what to do with your life, and day-to-day factors which influence our level

of motivation. From there, we turn to the role of hope in faith in psychology, and how these

forces can both boost and restrain your ability to change. We discuss the way a fear of hope

can constrain your life while you sometimes need to embrace staying the same in order to

...