What makes great sex? Well, great. If you ask sex therapist Vanessa Marin, a lot of it comes down to being able to talk about it.

The thing is, those conversations can feel daunting and complicated.

So Vanessa and her husband, Xander, have created a guide, sex talks, the five conversations

that will transform your love life.

That book landed them on the New York Times bestsellers list, which is a testament to the

need for the space they're creating.

Vanessa and I talk about the different types of sexual drives,

why there is no such thing as a normal sex life,

and what is motivating her to build a sex and relationship advice empire. Vanessa, thanks so much for doing this.

Thank you so much for having me. I'm really excited to be here.

Vanessa, who taught you about sex? Nobody. That was a big problem. The reason that I am a sex therapist

actually does boil down to my parents' attempt at giving me the talk, but all that they could

really muster up was to say, if you have any questions about, you know, sex. You can ask us.

But it was very obvious in the moment that what they were really saying is, please, for the

love of God, do not ask us any questions.

We don't want to talk about this.

Let's all just stay quiet.

And so we never had any conversation other than that.

And it was tough for me as a child because I had so many questions about sex. I was hearing

things on the playground. I was curious. I had also discovered a stack of cosmopolitan magazines

that the college girls who lived next door were throwing away. So actually that might be the answer.

Cosmo magazine might have been what taught me about sex. The challenge with learning about

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