Why Losing Everything Can Lead to Your Most Authentic Self

The Angry Therapist Podcast

John Kim

Mental Health, Health & Fitness

4.6 • 1.1K Ratings

🗓️ 22 October 2025

⏱️ 83 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

In this special episode, John Kim brings together five brilliant voices - Amy Chan, Terri Cole, Dene Logan, Vanessa Bennett, and Daniel Stewart - for a raw and honest conversation about love, grief, codependency, and what it really means to grow. They unpack: Turning loss into a wake-up call 🌿 The biology of heartbreak and trauma bonds ❤️‍🔥 How to tell if growth is healthy or self-abandonment What a “midlife crisis” is really trying to teach us Redefining partnership, independence, and self-love It’s messy, heartfelt, and deeply human - a quilt of wisdom and laughter about what it means to be alive and love in 2025. Guests: Amy Chan – Author of “Breakup Bootcamp” @missamychan Terri Cole – Author of “The Boundary Boss” & “Too Much” @terricole Dene Logan – Author of “Sovereign Love” @dene.logan Vanessa Bennett – Author of “The Motherhood Myth” @vanessabennetttherapy Daniel Stewart – Psychotherapist, teacher & musician @minstrelion Join John in Costa Rica, Dec 1–5. A retreat for connection, creativity, and fresh starts with an optional two-day medicine journey. Sign up HERE Read John’s new book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	After Vanessa and I lost our friend, my marriage ended like three months later. And there was a way that that loss sort of prepared me for the loss of my marriage because it was a little bit like my heart was just open in a different way. And I kind of wanted to be more intentional about the way that I continued to love. And I feel like my friend sort of prepared me for like nothing is really lost.
0:22.0	You're okay.
0:23.0	And how do you want to love given that, you know, this time is so fleeting?
0:30.5	I'm John Kim, a licensed therapist who used to be a miserable fuck before going on a
0:34.8	hero's journey and turning expired relationships into revelations.
0:38.9	I use my story to help others come with you instead of at you, unrehearsed on purpose,
0:45.4	because self-help doesn't have to be polished or complicated, just honest.
0:56.8	Amy Chan is with us today. She's Chinese American.
0:58.4	No, I'm Chinese communion.
1:01.7	No, that's...
1:03.4	What?
1:04.2	Well, whoa, wait, hold on.
1:05.2	What's wrong?
1:06.2	Amy!
1:07.4	Are you not Chinese?
1:09.4	I'm Chinese Canadian.
1:12.9	Oh, you're Chinese.
1:13.4	Oh, shit, that's right.
1:14.8	Oh, I forgot your Chinese Canadian.
1:17.3	You just gave me so much.
1:19.2	Oh, my God.
1:20.0	That's so important these days, American version.
	...

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