Why I have coffee with people who send me hate mail | Özlem Cekic

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4.1 • 11.9K Ratings

🗓️ 6 November 2018

⏱️ 15 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Özlem Cekic's email inbox has been full of hate mail since 2007, when she won a seat in the Danish Parliament -- becoming the first female Muslim to do so. At first she just deleted the emails, dismissing them as the work of fanatics, until one day a friend made an unexpected suggestion: to reach out to the hate mail writers and invite them to meet for coffee. Hundreds of "dialogue coffee" meetings later, Cekic shares how face-to-face conversation can be one of the most powerful forces to disarm hate -- and challenges us all to engage with people we disagree with.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	This TED Talk features bridge builder, Oslam Seekich, recorded live at We the Future, presented by TED, the Skoll Foundation and the United Nations Foundation.
0:13.0	My inbox is full of hate maids and personal abuse and has been for years.
0:24.7	In 2010, I started answering those maids and suggesting to the writer that we might meet for coffee and a chat.
0:30.5	I have had hundreds of encounters.
0:34.3	They have taught me something important that I want to share with you.
0:38.3	I was born in Turkey from Kurdish parents,
0:43.3	and we moved to Denmark when I was a young child.
0:46.3	In 2007, I ran for a seat in the Danish parliament
0:50.3	as one of the first women with a minority background.
1:00.0	I was elected, but I soon found out that not everyone was happy about it, as I had to quickly get using to finding hate messages in my inbox.
1:07.0	These emails will begin with something like this.
1:11.6	What's the rackhead like you doing in our parliament?
1:15.3	I never answered.
1:17.3	I just delete the emails.
1:19.4	I just thought that the senders and I had nothing in common.
1:24.6	They didn't understand me, and I didn't understand them.
1:28.3	Then one day, one of my colleagues in the parliament said that I should save the hate
1:35.3	maids.
1:36.3	When something happens to you, it'll give the police a lead.
1:42.3	I noticed that she said, when something happens and not if.
1:47.0	Sometimes, hateful letters were also sent to my home address.
1:53.0	The more I became involved in public debate,
	...

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