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Hold it now.

You are about to hear the most interesting, informative, thought-provoking, and funny show in America.

On air and on the World Wide Web, this is the Rob Carson Show.

This is the Rob Carson Show. It's Monday, kids. Welcome to it. Come on in. Have us set a spell, will you? And join me because we got a lot of stuff to get to. I mean a lot of stuff. Listen, I've been doing show prep all damn weekend. I did have a little bit of fun this weekend. I had a little bit of fun this weekend. I had a dinner party with people over at the apartment on Saturday night. I cooked all day, man. I cooked all day like it was going out of style. And I had a good time watching a lot of football this week. And oh my goodness, cream is rising to the top of the NFL. And then Sunday morning, are you ready for this? If you're streaming, you might want to watch right now because I'm going to show you me being mounted by a goat. Go ahead, gather around your computer right there. Gather around your computer, your smart device and see Rob Carson mounted by a goat this weekend. Here it is. Ready? Here it is right here. And there it is right there. See, I was invited to this thing where apparently this place that does goat yoga. I know, they do goat yoga.

Whatever, I don't do goat yoga.

I don't do yoga, all right?

Never will do yoga.

But there was this little gathering and it was a goat rescue place and I was invited by some people to go over and see the goats and everything.

And it's a big deal for city folk because city folk never you know are around animals

or anything you know so they're not used to you know seeing pigs and stuff and they'll they'll pay people

to pet a goat it's it's ridiculous it's insane but uh you know i said oh what the hell we'll do this we'll do this

...