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Am I the Genius?

What’s The Most HILARIOUS Thing Someone Has said Coming off of ANESTHESIA?

Am I the Genius?

amithejerk.com

Education, Self-improvement

4.6769 Ratings

🗓️ 23 March 2026

⏱️ 23 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

What's the most hilarious thing someone has said coming off of anesthesia?

0:05.5

Female patient after a C-section asking me how many chickens she had because she had beef with

0:10.4

pig.

0:11.3

Her husband translated, How much the baby weighed because I have a bet with hubby.

0:16.2

Kind of sweet that the husband understood her nonsense so effortlessly.

0:20.5

A 15-year-old was waking up and talking more and trying to get out of bed before he was ready.

0:25.3

Bud, where are you going?

0:26.7

I've got to go to my locker.

0:28.2

Buddy, you're in hospital.

0:29.5

You can't go to your locker right now.

0:31.2

So where are you trying to go?

0:32.7

He gave me a very serious expression.

0:35.1

The future.

0:41.6

My wife is a dentist. One of her patients started moaning loudly.

0:46.4

Not the typical moans and groans, I mean like the really good bedroom fun times moaning.

0:53.1

It was loud enough that half the clinic heard, including the waiting area. A man asked me if his body parts still belonged to him, and I still think about it. I work in

0:58.2

the operating room. Funniest was a guy quickly sitting straight up after extubation. We're all

1:03.2

standing around him, making sure he doesn't try to jump off the table, and he looks at me,

1:07.1

and then slowly gives me double finger pistols. Turns his head to another staff member and

1:11.6

slowly gives them finger pistols. Didn't say a word, just finger pistols. Pugh, pew, pew. A lot of people

1:17.9

wake up really crazy. They just start swinging or getting really restless on a narrow operating

1:23.0

room bed. It's really nice when they wake up sleepy and I'll just bundle them up with blankies

...

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