What is the most embarrassing thing you had to tell your parents?

When I was seven or eight, my grandma bought me this pair of jean shorts that were way too small, but she insisted I wear them anyway.

Throughout the course of the day, the rubbing of the shorts caused a few cuts and something like rug burn all over my downstairs bits.

When I went to pee, of course, it burned like crazy. I had to go to

my mum and explain what had happened. It was awful. I once got a bunch of jelly beans for Valentine's Day

from my ex-girlfriend. I hate jelly beans. Absolutely think they're the worst tasting things in the

world, but I acted like I was grateful and took them home.

Four weeks later, it's 8pm on a Friday, and my car broke down. No one could really make it out of my house, so I was sitting in my room bored.

So I started tossing jelly beans up and trying to catch them in my ear. Well, after an hour, I got one to land in my ear, like really

in my ear. I went to retrieve it and I pushed it in further. So for 30 minutes, I tried getting

it out, and it kept getting wedged deeper and deeper. So finally, I walked upstairs,

looked at my mum on the couch and said, I have a jelly bean stuck in my ear.

She blinked and stared for a minute and then asked, how old are you? 16, I'm going to use this

key to try and get that jelly bean out of your ear. If that doesn't work, I'm using it to drive you

to the pediatrician since you're a goddamn four-year-old.

She was able to get the jelly bean out after a while.

I started a stamp collection when I was 13.

I really liked stamps, but nobody mailed me anything, and my parents never got any good ones.

So I started checking my paper route customers' mailboxes and was able to start a really good collection that way.

I hid my collection in the basement because I thought my parents were searching my room.

One day, my dad found hundreds of letters addressed to different people in the neighborhood, where I hid them behind the Christmas stuff.

And he freaked and started yelling at my mom.

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