Wellness + Wisdom | Episode 728

Is the real reason you’ve never felt ‘good enough’ hiding in the conversations you’re terrified to have with yourself?

Vasavi Kumar, Therapist + Visibility Coach, joins Josh Trent on the Wellness + Wisdom Podcast, episode 728, to reveal why speaking your truth out loud is the key to claiming self-worth and real freedom, and how daily mirror work, honest self-talk, and embracing your authentic voice can shift the trajectory of your life, relationships, and mental health.

"Many people struggle with having a cluttered mind. You need to say it out loud. Get it out of your head. Get it out into the ether. Don't keep it inside. Allow yourself to say the thing that is taking up space in your mind so that you can have a mind that actually is thriving and peaceful within." - Vasavi Kumar

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In This Episode, Vasavi Kumar Uncovers:

[01:10] Say It Out Loud

• Vasavi Kumar
• Why Vasavi used to be a "pick me" girl in relationships.
• How she learned to speak up for what she wants.
• Say It Out Loud by Vasavi Kumar
• Finding Joe (2011)
• How to access our inner voice.
• The purpose of talking out loud to ourselves in the mirror.
• Why Vasavi stands in front of the mirror naked every day.

[06:35] Dealing with Bipolar Disorder

• Why we learn through language and the role of AI.
• How Vasavi didn't feel worthy and didn't value herself.
• Why self-talk helped her manage her bipolar disorder thoughts.
• 722 Alex Wolfe | Amanita Muscaria’s Hidden Healing Codes: Can This Ancient Mushroom Abolish Big Pharma? Legal Microdosing For A Mental Health Revolution
• How she felt relieved when she was diagnosed with bipolar.
• The Tao of Bipolar by C. Alexander Simpkins + Annellen M. Simpkins
• Why she started learning how to manage her energy.
• How she resisted taking medications for bipolar disease.

[12:55] How to Be One With Yourself + Be Authentic

• Why God only gives us what we are capable of handling.
• How bipolarity is the duality within us.
• What it means to be one with ourselves.
• Why there is healing in being seen.
• Why paying attention to ourselves can help us become more authentic.
• How Vasavi spends a lot of time with herself.

[18:25] Family Shapes Who You Become

• How Vasavi's mother used to beat her, to tell the truth.
• Why her father didn't stand up for her when she was hit by her mother.
• How she struggled with imposter syndrome as a writer.
• What made Vasavi heal from cocaine addiction.
• Why she lied about her sobriety and drug addiction on TV.
• How her motivation to heal her addiction was not wanting to feel too much pain.

[25:50] Is Imposter Syndrome a Good Thing?

• Why "fake it till you make it" is not helping us.
• How a mushroom journey made Josh change the podcast name.
• Why Vasavi didn't fully believe she knew what she was talking about in her book while she was writing it.
• How imposter syndrome is protecting us.
• Instagram @mynameisvasavi
• Why Vasavi made a promise to God to pay it forward if she gets sober.
• How she moved through her imposter syndrome.

[32:45] How to Create a Connection with God

• Why everyone is worthy and loveable.
• God doesn't make any mistakes.
• How the connection to God helped Vasavi improve her relationship with herself.
• 009 How To Live An Extraordinary Life With Hal Elrod
• Why bipolar is seen and talked about negatively by most people.
• How Vasavi stops herself from showing emotions to not be perceived as a crazy bipolar person.
• Why she's angry at people who say we shouldn't take medication for mental health.

[37:45] Stop Fixing Other People's Problems

• Why Josh wanted to fix his mother who has bipolar disorder when he was younger.
• 277 How To Access Your Inner Coach: Christine Hassler
• How Vasavi always asks her clients for permission to give them feedback.
• The importance of telling people upfront that we only need them to listen to us without giving us advice.
• Why she was picking emotionally unavailable partners to fix them.
• 548 Dr. Stan Tatkin | Healing Toxic Relationships: What’s The Bite That Fits Each Other’s Wounds?
• How Vasavi's father was avoidant and suppressed his emotions.
• Why she believes his father's disease is related to him not speaking his truth out loud.
• How she's not focusing on dating and trusts that God has a plan.

[45:10] The Key to Manifesting Your Dreams

• Why manifestation doesn't work if we don't take any action.
• How getting clear on what we want is essential to manifesting our dreams.
• Human Design Made Simple by Emma Dunwoody
• Why it's important to pay attention to how we feel in order to find what we truly want in life.
• How people manifest based on societal programming.
• Why Vasavi provides support for herself and pushes herself to grow and succeed.

[50:30] Become Obsessed With Yourself

• How becoming obsessed with ourselves will change our lives.
• Why we spend most of our time focusing on external things.
• What Vasavi's inner dialogue sounds like.
• 361 Luke Storey: Relationships, Consciousness, & Coming Home To Yourself

[53:20] Take Time In Silence Before You Speak Your Truth Out Loud

• Why healing is a byproduct of expression.
• How we can cause harm by how we deliver our truth.
• Why it's important to take time in solitude and silence in order to process what we're going through.
• How connecting to our body can tell us if we're tapping into our intuition.
• Why Vasavi can feel someone's bad intentions in her chest.

[57:35] How to Get Into A Flow State

• What neurodivergent people do differently than regular people.
• How breathwork keeps showing Josh his wounds.
• Why Vasavi dances, shakes, or prays to put herself in a flow state.
• How self-pleasure allows her to connect with her body and feel good.

[01:02:05] Why Couples Grow Apart

• Why it was hard for Vasavi to balance the American and Indian cultures.
• How she was raised by a hard-working mother who wasn't in touch with her body.
• Why divorce taught her to walk away from situations that don't feel right.
• How Vasavi and her ex-husband grew apart after many years together.

[01:07:00] You're Allowed to Change Your Mind

• How Vasavi uses astrology for important events in her life.
• I Don't Believe in Astrology by Debra Silverman
• How she explored many career paths for herself.
• Why everyone's allowed to change their mind.

[01:11:20] The Practice of Self-Love

• Why Vasavi always believed something was fundamentally wrong with her.
• How Josh has been asking himself how he's going to do it all.
• Why asking ourselves how we're going to love ourselves through it all gives us an opportunity to practice self-love.
• Lisa Nichols
• How Vasavi started speaking in public about living with bipolar disorder.
• What makes a good story.
• The Hero's Journey by Joseph Campbell

[01:19:30] Heal Yourself Through Your Voice

• Why being a leader means we need to go first.
• How we need to say out loud anything that's eating us up.
• What it takes to create a safe container to hold space.
• Johnny Blackburn
• How Vasavi leads a support group to help people say their thoughts out loud.

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Power Quotes From The Show

Access Your Inner Voice

"We all have access to the voice inside of us. But because of society, programming, our parents voices, the thoughts in our head get very loud and in order for us to access that voice inside of us, we have to say it out loud." - Vasavi Kumar

Mirror Work

"The mirror will always show you where you're not being kind to yourself. Because the minute you start scanning your body and tell yourself negative things about your body inside your head, you can pause that dialogue and you can choose to reframe it and be kinder to yourself in that moment." - Vasavi Kumar

You Are Worthy Love

"All roads lead to the fact that we are worthy, we are lovable, and that we have to learn to see ourselves first. We have to see ourselves in the image of our creator." - Vasavi Kumar

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Links From Today's Show 

• Vasavi Kumar
• Say It Out Loud by Vasavi Kumar
• Finding Joe (2011)
• 722 Alex Wolfe | Amanita Muscaria’s Hidden Healing Codes: Can This Ancient Mushroom Abolish Big Pharma? Legal Microdosing For A Mental Health Revolution
• The Tao of Bipolar by C. Alexander Simpkins + Annellen M. Simpkins
• Instagram @mynameisvasavi
• 009 How To Live An Extraordinary Life With Hal Elrod
• 277 How To Access Your Inner Coach: Christine Hassler
• 548 Dr. Stan Tatkin | Healing Toxic Relationships: What’s The Bite That Fits Each Other’s Wounds?
• Human Design Made Simple by Emma Dunwoody
• 361 Luke Storey: Relationships, Consciousness, & Coming Home To Yourself
• I Don't Believe in Astrology by Debra Silverman
• Lisa Nichols
• The Hero's Journey by Joseph Campbell
• Johnny Blackburn