I can't handle reading old journals.

I can read little kid ones but the ones that I wrote when I was like 13 through like 16. I'm just like, oh no. It's bad. It hurts me physically. I remember one time and this is like angst reacting to angst because I was like maybe 17 16 probably and I had found a bunch of

poems that I had written when I was like 1314 yeah you know I was still in that

span of time but when you're 1314 that's it's real special it's real like new to you and you don't know and you're

expressing in this way of like and you think every way that you express yourself is original and then you don't realize it until later that it's like you were just every trope like growing up.

Absolutely. I took all of my poems and everything and I threw it in our fireplace.

You burned it?

I burned everything.

Wow.

Everything because I was, this is shit, no one should ever have to read it and now I mean it's like no you wish you

I wish I had it but it was like that was that was my big angsty thing yeah anyway

all of this kind of fits with what we're talking about. Past angst is like talking about journaling and things like that.

You know, it really, that's just like a time to where I wish, and you don't when you're in high school, some people have, they started really early, you know, but like you don't know about these techniques in high school and I wish I did. I wish I had this book in high school to be like, look, you can do these things, you'll feel better,

calm down.

You know, like, and I...

I feel like I dragged a train box box what is that word car a train car train car yeah

I couldn't think of it either I froze I was like I went my brain went caboose I drug a caboose of just like dark

sticky energy yeah I did on and off overall I've always been lucky enough to always have been a happy person yeah I mean except for like

Life running issues that you know you carry anger around but like I did have some like teen hormone fluctuation tantrum years, but I was never

miserable. I was never sad for you know like I would do things would make me sad I'd get mad at mom and you know I

would think no one understood me but it wasn't like a long but I was very cheerful and

never really got into too much of the emotional heaviness that you can hit in those

...