You know, I'm going to give you a history lesson.

We got some dumb-ass motherfuckers floating around this country.

Stop laughing.

And when I do, start fucking.

Also, y'all did some nasty-ass jokes on my ass, too.

Funny jokes and unfunny jokes come out of the same birth.

You fucking guys are unbelievable.

Why are you laughing?

Evening, everybody.

Welcome to another episode of Why Are You Laughing, a history of comedy podcast.

And today, I am pleased to introduce to you the top 19 living comedians of all time.

I guess that doesn't work. The top 19 living comedians. I guess we can end it there. And you might be thinking, Mike, not only could you not say what the title of this

episode was right off the bat, but why 19? That seems like a very strange number. And I'll tell you why.

It's Jerry Seinfeld's fault, believe it or not. I made the list and I said, you know what, the way I've constructed this list, it's impossible

for me to not include Seinfeld.

And then as I was going through Seinfeld clips, I was looking for clips of his standup

and it infuriated me so much.

Then I started thinking, who can I put above Seinfeld?

And he just ruined the entire experience for me, really.

So I said, you know what, that's it.

We don't, 20th place is whoever you want.

It's you, the fans.

...