This is Ashley Stone and you know where it kind of started?

All right.

Well, I was actually raised by a mom that was a member of the church and a dad that was not.

And my mom, for all of us kids, had us going to church and my dad wasn't a member but she was a very strong member so we

stayed pretty close to the church and I mean she was the rock as far as spirituality came. And when I was little I was kind of, I don't know if I was the black sheep right from the start, but I stole my dad's beer and I spoke to cigarettes behind the tree and I was kind of that one.

My dad was like 12 my older brothers.

Where's my beer?

Me at first grade.

Come on, da da da da da.

And they're like, which one of you boys still, anyways?

So it was this little first grader.

Oh my God.

I've had quite a go, but that's not how my life I mean that was just a small time and really I was raised so well it was crazy. I was raised so good. My dad actually passed away when I was nine and so my mom remarried and we lived in Iowa falls and then we moved to Rigby so I was nine years old in Rigby and going to school there.

Even at home I got baptized by my one of the bar neighbors and I even at the time clear back then I thought you know what there's something different about me and I just had this attraction to my friends and I was I you know I literally was a gay boy that didn't want to be gay or know anything about it.

So I literally dealt, this was clear back in 1970 something, I dealt with this is the worst thing ever. 70 something

wrong with me for so,

I dealt with, this is the worst thing ever. And, you know, I thought something's wrong with me for so, so long, most of my life, you know, growing up. So it was tough. It was really, really tough because all my family were into sports and I love sports.

I just truly tried to follow my brother's footsteps

and they were football players and basketball players and I was pretty fast and I was you know I was pretty good in sports but at the same time I always have this this connection same sex attraction and it was horrible because I thought I was

such a horrible guy and horrible kid and there was nobody to talk to.

And so I went through a lot of just really self-doubt of what is going on in myself.

And it just continued on till I was a sophomore in high school and when I was a sophomore I actually had an experience with the kid which just sent me backward and I was like, oh, I hate being gay. Being gay is the worst thing I can think of. There's something

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