This Week's News | Jon on Trump's BS Iran Negotiations & Josh on ICE at Airports and Melania's Robot
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Comedy Central
4.2 • 14.2K Ratings
🗓️ 28 March 2026
⏱️ 47 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | You're listening to Comedy Central. |
| 0:07.6 | The dizzy and chaotic carnival ride that is Donald Trump's America |
| 0:12.2 | continues to careen down shit show hill. |
| 0:15.5 | It's fucking madness out there. |
| 0:17.9 | TSA lines longer than your actual trip. Escalating threats in the Middle East. |
| 0:24.5 | Planes, driving into trucks. The only thing giving me joy is looking forward to this season of |
| 0:31.9 | The Bachelorette. I mean, they've got a strong Mormon woman. She seems lovely. |
| 0:39.0 | I hope that she finds... |
| 0:41.0 | Hold on a second. I'm getting a call. |
| 0:43.6 | No! |
| 0:48.1 | But luckily, in everything that is going wrong in our country, |
| 0:51.7 | our intrepid leader is utterly unbothered. |
| 0:55.9 | The world disintegrates around him largely due to his actions. |
| 1:02.0 | Yet he still managed to spend the weekend golfing a couple of times and partying at Mar-a-Lago. |
| 1:10.0 | I didn't know if he was going to be here today. |
| 1:15.3 | I am supposed to be prosecuting the war. |
| 1:26.3 | You know, I really think that the less fun we're all having, the better he seems to be doing. |
| 1:35.3 | Does he run on our misery? |
| 1:37.9 | Does that make him stronger? |
| 1:39.7 | Now, to be fair, that was the weekend. |
| 1:42.7 | Obviously, today is Monday, the only day of the work week. |
| 1:59.7 | It's time to focus and get down to the sobering business of wrapping up this war. |
... |
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