Welcome back ladies, this is part 2 of Wimmy & Impat with the Insanely Epic James Sexton, who is the number one divorce attorney in the freaking country. Now in part 1, we actually expose why you cannot reason that your way out of a power struggle is someone who actually needs control. And once you hear that, you'll never forget it. But the moment when most of us actually get stuck is when the pressure actually hits. It's when the story frickin flips. It's when you feel that surge of panic and you think I don't cross myself to handle this because that person you're not like the person you've been in that power struggle with has withered you down. They've literally stripped you of your confidence that allows you to believe in yourself and your gut instincts and that's what today is all about because part two is where James shows us how power actually shifts. Not through yelling, not through proving that you're right, but actually through strategy, restraint, and letting the other person hang themselves on their own words. Guys, this is freaking genius. I can't wait for you to listen to it because in this episode we literally break down how people thrive on control and when they're forced to commit to their own word, you can literally see them unravel. So I'm telling you, if you see this, you can stop actually over-explaining once and for. We then talk about the exact way that sets traps that reveal the manipulation without you escalating or losing your core. Now this is really important because in moments you can't control other people. You can not control how they're going to show up and so if you're dealing with someone who's toxic, someone who's an narcissist, they are going to show every fang and every horn they possibly can to manipulate and scare you and this tip that he gives is literally genius on how the hell you can keep your call in these moments. We also talk about how to regain leverage. The moment you start to feel like you're doubting yourself or you're freezing or you're backtracking, this technique and strategy will actually help you walk away instead of actually spiraling out of control.

And finally, we talk about the five types of infidelity. Guys knowing this isn't a go-our, make sure your partner isn't doing it, it's just a knowledge game. It's understanding the way that we show up, understanding how the way your partner can show up, understanding the freaking struggles that some people are just not speaking of. And I'm all about freaking knowledge is power. Once I learn something, I'm now able to control how I show up. Who I led into my life, who I allowed to connect with and who I just keep at arm's length. So ladies, this is the part that actually helps you rebuild yourself trust and your confidence in yourself. And I'm not talking about that confidence that you fake externally, but the confidence where you actually earn your own self trust, because you know that you can actually handle these moments when they happen. So if you've ever thought, am I going crazy? Am I stuck? Is this my life forever? Then my homie stay with me because let's dive right back in to James Exson right here on Women of Impact. So what happens in the Solommead example? Sommead example is all of a sudden, this different, this novelty is out there. And social media has made it 50 times easier. Like if we were gonna invent an infidelity generating machine, it would be Instagram or Facebook. Because all of a sudden I'm talking to people that I kind of have no business talking to.

And by the way, there are entry points

that are totally innocent.

Like I follow you on Facebook

because our kids are on the same soccer team

and that they post on the group about when the soccer is.

And now I see photos of you in a bikini

because you went on vacation.

And now I have a totally innocent entry point,

like meaning, I'm not saying like nefariously,

and oh, where'd you guys go?

Where'd you stay?

How was it?

Oh, we stayed until the once it was great. Who did you like this? And now what's going on? We're talking. We're talking, and you're interested. I don't know everything about you. You're not, again, it's like the nanny example.

Like you, the me and the me, when the we takes over,

you and everything about you,

I know I even know what you're gonna do next in bed.

This person's a mystery. And so now innocently I've engaged with this person and is it normal and human? I'm not excusing it. I'm explaining it. I think it's normal to find this other person fascinating and interesting. And then a lot of people take the bait and they take it to the next level and they cross the line. They cross the line to flirtation and they cross the line to connection meeting up and maybe like, okay, well, it's going to one time and then it turns into and then people come home and go, I met my soul mate. Because I love you and I love our life and I love the kids, but this person makes me feel something that I haven't felt, this excitement, this passion. Now, that's heartbreaking. Like, because someone coming home and saying, like, I found my person and it's not you. Like, this is my favorite person. Like, oh, God, that just hit me. She's bad as it gets. She's bad as it gets, you know? And again, like, you know, Sonsanichan said, if only there were evil people, like just out there insidiously doing evil. But the truth is, like, you know, the line of good evil runs through the human heart. Like, we all have weakness in us. We all have beauty in us. We all have ugliness in us. We all have insecurity in us. We all have confidence in us. Like, when you spend time with people who cheat, the way that I do, you really start to view them in a more sympathetic fashion because people don't do evil because they're evil. They mistake it for happiness. Like they think this is going to make them happy. Like there is scared and lonely and insecure and frightened of the,

the thousand natural shocks the flesh is heir to. Like, they're, they're just human. I definitely understand that from an intellectual standpoint, I think for me, obviously being married and so I'm just like, then just leave. Like, if you're finding this attraction, maybe you didn't even and me to write in your finding this connection,

acknowledge it and then assess whether that's worth leaving your marriage for. It's the deceit and the lies and the betrayal that I have such a hard time. Because especially when you're married, I'm just gonna speak with, I have zero jealousy over my husband. Like I trust him implicitly and I've told him and I know that in trusting him implicitly, he has my heart in his hands and he can absolutely hurt me. But I think that's what marriage is. That's what taking that risk is. Is I'm going to give myself over to you. The problem is when someone abuses it and I understand that there's so much complexity to humans. I just have such a strong moral compass for myself that there's no circumstance ever that I would cheat on my husband. I may leave him. I may be unhappy and I'd navigate it, but the infidelity comes so freaking hard. Well, you know, the most common question when a man finds out his wife is cheating, is, did you fuck him? Yes. And the most common question when a woman finds out her husband cheated is, do you love her? And that tells you I think everything you need to know. Yeah. Like so your answer is like, you know what you just said,

a second ago when you said, well, you know,

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