It was never the

supposed to be beneficial all round, a win-win for everybody, but the betterment of

people's lives was never the intention behind their service.

They knew that the system couldn't hold that many people. They knew that the fantasy

they were selling was a fraud. They knew exactly how to monopolize off a people's desperation, people that I cared about.

Before I moved in with my parents, I fit the criteria of I looked to target demographic, lonely, exhausted, simultaneously

over and understimulated by my occupation, while significantly stressful, the administrative

work I was doing was far from fulfilling.

I spent much of my time in my apartment and the minimal human context that I had outside

of work typically consisted of fleeting orchid interactions that resulted from accidental

walking into someone's path on the sidewalk or standing too long in front of the jars

of past the source of the grocery store. People were generally polite in these situations, but I could

always spell out inconvenienced from the lines on their faces. So, when things got bad

for me, I moved back home I couldn't take the monotony any longer at least not at my own

My parents never had the best life advice and my younger brother's words were more often damaging

to my self-esteem than constructive.

But none of that really mattered.

All of the pain I was experiencing, even the numb lack thereof would be replaced by reassurance.

A hearty comfort, again to the consumption of a steaming bowl of soup at the end of a day spent

out in the cold.

Whenever I was held by someone I loved.

My mom pulled me into her arms when I arrived on a doorstep and I was overwhelmed by the sensation of stability.

...