The Rural Jurors

Lovett or Leave It

Crooked Media

Comedy, News

4.7 • 25.1K Ratings

🗓️ 25 January 2020

⏱️ 48 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

The impeachment trial begins: Adam Schiff and the House managers make their case and Republican Senators both demand and refuse to allow new evidence. Florida's Republicans are undermining Amendment 4 which restores the vote to those convicted of felonies. Plus C-Span's production values are just OK and it's time we have an honest conversation about organic peanut butter. Aida Osman and Sam Pancake join to help break down the week's news and just sit around sharing memories of Mr. Peanut and really focus on making this a celebration of his life.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Good evening, Los Angeles.
0:22.1	May notice in the sound of my voice, I'm a little bit like Tom Hanks at the Golden Globes.
0:29.5	Twice as sick, half as charming.
0:33.5	What are you getting? What kind of footage are you getting right now?
0:36.5	Against some good stuff? No, it's okay, I'm not trying to just...
0:42.5	You came all the way from London? Wow!
0:49.5	Thanks for coming. Seems as though we're heading towards Monarchy right as you're heading away from it.
0:56.5	Sort of interesting. Your ancient dictatorial traditions are coming to an end just as we as a nation are rediscovering some of its virtues.
1:06.5	Podsave America and Love It or Leave It are going on tour. We are going everywhere, including Iowa City in one week.
1:13.5	Go to Crooked.com slash events and watch my Twitter feed. We're going to be announcing those Iowa guests.
1:18.5	Alright, let's get into it. What a week.
1:23.5	We're going to talk about the news on everyone's mind. Mr. Peanut has died at the age of 104. Finally, some good news.
1:35.5	But don't worry, the lawsuit against his estate will continue. His victims could still see restitution. Thanks to more incredible reporting by Ronan Farrow.
1:46.5	Stop it.
1:48.5	I'll never hear this. It's... Please do not have a suspect in the death of Mr. Peanut, but they should be able to match the DNA to the semen collected at the crime scene.
2:00.5	I'm not stopping. I don't know what you think on this card, but it's not more jokes about Mr. Peanut.
2:09.5	Not to be outdone for aggressive announced that live during halftime at the Super Bowl, they will be murdering the actress who plays flow.
2:19.5	Alright, I'm done. Hillary killed Mr. Peanut. I'm done.
2:25.5	Breaking news, Hillary Clinton, not a fan of Bernie Sanders. But she will support the nominee.
2:33.5	Will she like it if Bernie is the nominee? I do not think so. She'll scream so loud in Chappacua. They'll hear her on Wall Street.
2:41.5	Which is fine because then she can collect her usual fee.
2:46.5	Anyway, this is the last few days before voting, which is crazy, but it's true. So this is the last chance we have to talk before the votes are cast.
	...

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