We are receiving this time

and uh

receiving this message

We are Ken Jennings and John Roderick

We speak to you from our present, which we can only assume is your distant past

The turbulent time that was the early 21st century Fearing the great cataclysm that will surely befall our civilization,

we began this monumental reference of strange and obscure human knowledge.

These recordings represent our attempt to compile and preserve wonders and esoterica that would otherwise be lost.

So whether you're listening from an advanced civilization or have just reinvented the technology

to decrypt our transmissions, this is our legacy to you.

This is our time capsule. This is the omnibus.

This is the omnibus. You have accessed and You have accessed entry 966.G.E. 2803. Certificate number 2037. The population bomb.

Because you murdered half the planet.

A small price to pay for salvation.

You're insane.

Ken, you know probably as well as anyone,

how concerned I am about climate change.

It's kind of your main thing.

Like, do you have a thing in front of your house that says, in this house, climate change is real?

Because maybe you should get one of those and then we would know how sincere your liberal bona fides are.

In my house, the climate changes all the time.

Because you leave the doors open?

...