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Women of Impact

The Cycle Ends With You: Dr. Ramani’s Proven Steps to Break the Cycle & Heal for Real (Fan Fav)

Women of Impact

Impact Theory

Society & Culture, Relationships, Education

4.8701 Ratings

🗓️ 5 August 2025

⏱️ 73 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

By now, you are most likely aware of narcissistic behavior being grandiose, egotistical and charming. If many of us can describe a narcissistic person, then how do we fall into unhealthy relationships with people that have zero concern for our happiness or well being? If you’ve experienced a relationship with a narcissistic person or happen to be currently living through narcissistic abuse then you are familiar with the frustration, the gaslighting, and feeling totally lost on how to end it or get out of the relationship. There are very clear traps narcissists use to keep hold of the people they want to control. Dr. Ramani Durvasula is an expert in narcissism and clinical psychologist. She is also a repeat guest on the show, joining Lisa for the third time. She’s breaking down all the ways narcissists are trying to trap you, how to heal from narcissistic abuse to move on, and how to create better boundaries and a plan for revenge. Original air date: 1-5-22 SHOW NOTES: Feeling Lost | What does moving on from a narcissistic relationship look like [1:02] 5 Traps to Avoid | Dr. Ramani breaks down 5 traps in narcissistic relationships [5:39] Hoovering Trap | A powerplay tactic narcissist use to suck you in after you’ve left [9:38] Avoid Enablers | Dr. Ramani explains how enablers make it harder to walk away [11:44] The Hope Trap | Dr. Ramani reveals how narcissist trigger hope to keep you baited [13:44] Trapped by Guilt | When vulnerable narcissists trap with the belief you can save them [15:24] Responsibility | Dr. Ramani on why responsibility of being treated poorly is not on you [17:27] Trauma Bonding | Why people hold onto the good things in bad relationships explained [21:47] Breaking Triggers | Dr. Ramani explains why being alone for a whole year is necessary [25:35] Danger of Control | Why controlling what someone wears is a dangerous dynamic [35:53] Be Cherished | Dr. Ramani reveals why being cherished over desired is important [38:37] Rebuilding Trust | Why it’s hard to rebuild trust for with yourself and tips for progress [42:00] Boundaries | Dr. Ramani’s tips for setting boundaries when you don’t feel safe [55:21] Revenge | Dr. Ramani explains the best form of revenge against a narcissist [57:25] Self Efficacy | Dr. Ramani reveals how to heal from narcissistic abuse with indifference [1:04:38] CHECK OUT OUR SPONSORS Vital Proteins: Get 20% off by going to ⁠https://www.vitalproteins.com⁠ and entering promo code WOI at check out.  SleepMe: Visit ⁠https://sleep.me/woi⁠ to get your Chilipad and save 20% with code WOI. Try it risk-free with their 30-night sleep trial and free shipping! OneSkin: Get 15% off with code LISA at ⁠https://oneskin.co ⁠ Shopify: Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial period at ⁠https://shopify.com/lisa⁠ Macy’s: Upgrade your glam at ⁠https://macys.com⁠ FOLLOW LISA: Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/lisabilyeu/⁠ Twitter: ⁠https://twitter.com/lisabilyeu⁠ YouTube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/womenofimpact⁠ Tik Tok: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@lisa_bilyeu?lang=en⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

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0:10.1

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0:15.3

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0:19.9

So we started the business two years ago.

0:22.4

We had a few people who were used to PCs

0:24.6

and this was their first foray into Macs.

0:27.7

But it's been super smooth

0:29.0

getting everyone onto those devices

0:30.8

and everyone seems really, really happy.

0:33.2

Find out how Mac can help you run

0:35.3

and grow your business at apple.com forward slash hello vet.

0:40.8

You want to stick it to a narcissist?

0:43.3

Succeed.

0:44.8

That's it.

0:45.8

You stuck it to them.

0:46.8

If you can think of revenge as you being your best self, that shuts everybody down.

0:53.3

It's not the hope that the narcissist will get better. It's not the hope that the narcissist will get better.

0:57.0

It's not the hope that next time, you know, the next narcissist I'll figure it out, no, it's

1:01.8

the hope is around you are a better navigator of your own life and you had the wisdom

1:08.4

to extract the lessons from this really difficult experience.

1:16.6

Welcome to the show, Dr. Romney.

...

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