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Trauma & Narcissism Redefined

The Child's Trauma Response To The Narcissistic Parent

Trauma & Narcissism Redefined

Caroline Strawson

Narcissisticabuse, Health & Fitness, Narcissist, Self-improvement, Education, Recovery, Mental Health, Trauma

4.8 • 701 Ratings

🗓️ 16 February 2021

⏱️ 18 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

In today's episode, we will talk about future generations and narcissism. We will explore and analyze kids' trauma responses to being with a narcissist and the best ways to help them deal with it.

What You Will Learn In This Episode:

  • The importance of breaking the trauma cycle and teaching self-love to our kids
  • Parallel parenting as the best choice for co-parenting with a narcissist
  • The fourth trauma response to narcissistic abuse
  • Why our kids choose to misbehave with us
  • The best response we can offer to our angry children

When our kids come back to us aggressive or angry, we must see them through the trauma-informed lens. We need to understand them, show them love and compassion, be supportive and make them feel that we see them and hear them. Our kids misbehave with us because we are their anchor. We must be aware of that and build our relationship with them from that place. 

Resources:

Transcript

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0:00.0

Welcome to the narcissistic abuse recovery podcast. I'm Caroline Stawson and I'll be sharing with you

0:09.2

awareness, understanding and education about the devastating effects of narcissistic abuse to help you thrive.

0:16.8

I want you to know that I've been exactly where you are now and I believe you.

0:21.4

And this show is all about taking you from trauma to transformation.

0:30.4

So in today's episode, I want to talk to you about something that I feel really, really passionate about.

0:36.8

And that is our next generation.

0:39.2

You know, I have this amazing t-shirt that says, heal yourself and heal the next generation.

0:44.8

And it's something I feel really passionate about.

0:47.7

So in the work that I do, the one-to-one, the group work, my membership, it's very much about

0:53.5

helping those as adults really break that cycle

0:58.0

so that they can go on and teach their children, self-love, that they are good enough just simply

1:06.6

for who they are. Often, which those of us who have been involved in narcissistic relationships

1:12.2

or have narcissistic parents have never actually felt like. So today I want to talk to you

1:18.6

about children and a child's trauma response to a narcissist. And really this podcast today is for those of you who have children and you are

1:32.6

involved with a narcissist and maybe you're either still together, maybe you have gone through a

1:39.0

divorce. And this could be whether your children are young or old, because I'll kind of talk a little

1:43.9

bit about both as well.

1:46.1

So we know that our nervous system will respond in a way of a fight, flight, or freeze to our perception of danger.

1:55.3

It's actually flight first, fight and then freeze, but I suppose it just sounds easier to say, doesn't it? Fight,

2:02.6

flight, freeze. Or maybe don't say that if you've had a few to drinks. It might be a little

2:07.1

bit difficult to say. So I get a lot of messages from parents in particular where they are

2:14.6

trying to co-parent with a narcissist, which we know is impossible to do because

...

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