Mother's Day can feel like a minefield when your relationship with your mother has been painful or distant. Society tells us to celebrate with flowers and praise, but what if that’s not your truth? You don’t have to pretend. You don’t have to perform. You are allowed to be honest about how you feel.

Instead of being swept up in the pressure and performance, start focusing on what’s real for you. This week, pay attention to what lifts you. Celebrate the people and the progress that remind you you’re loved, seen, and growing. Let your joy come from within, not from forced expectations.

And if sadness shows up—let it. Feel it. Care for yourself with compassion, not shame. Healing doesn’t mean you never hurt. It means you know how to care for yourself when you do.

This Mother’s Day, center yourself. You get to define what this day means to you now. And that, in itself, is powerful.

In this episode, we talk about how to care for yourself before and during Mother’s Day, especially if your relationship with your mom is painful or complicated. I share why it’s important to be honest about how I really feel, stop telling fake stories, and stay grounded in my truth. Instead of forcing happiness or pretending everything’s okay, I offer real ways to comfort yourself, feel your feelings, and find joy in your own life. This is a gentle, honest conversation to help you stay grounded during a tough time.

Topics Covered:

(00:00:00) Episode Snippet

(00:00:12) Welcome to The Black Mother Wound Podcast

(00:04:24) Be honest about how you feel

(00:05:59) Society can confuse your real feelings

(00:07:35) Mine for good feelings

(00:09:28) You create your feelings

(00:20:31) The fantasy is your underdeveloped ego

(00:22:54) Your responsibility is to you

(00:23:42) Resolve doors are open

(00:24:50) Fireside Chat Question

Key Takeaways:

“Healing really is about taking back control of your own mind.”

DISCLAIMER: I am not a licensed psychologist, medical doctor, or health care professional and my services do not replace the care of psychologists, doctors or other healthcare professionals. All opinions expressed here are my own. If you feel you are in any danger of harming yourself please call 911. I am not providing health care, medical or nutritional therapy services, or attempting to diagnose, treat, prevent or cure any physical, mental or emotional issue, disease or condition. All opinions are my own and based on my personal lived experience.

Connect on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/blackmotherwound

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Ep 060: Dealing with Mother’s Day When You Have a Mother Wound May 6, 2025

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@BreakfastClubPower1051FM

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Transcript

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0:00.0	This is an I-Heart podcast.
0:02.6	Guaranteed human.
0:04.4	Don't go in there all phony.
0:06.2	Like, this is the mom, you've been the best and you didn't.
0:08.6	Do not tell that hallmark story if it's not true because it's going to bite you in the fucking ass.
0:16.9	Welcome to the Black Mother Woon podcast, where we center the stories of black women as we heal from the painful relationships with our mothers.
0:26.2	Welcome to the Black Mother Woon podcast. I'm your host, Jennifer Arnese. Welcome back, y'all. What's happening? Happy Tuesday. I hope everyone is doing well today. Let me start off by thanking everyone for all of the
0:45.1	congratulations from last week when I told you all that I won the picture podcast contest on
0:53.6	with Black Effect podcast network. Thank'all so much like y'all
0:59.0	know i had to tell y'all because we really are in this all together you know what i'm saying
1:05.5	and i couldn't have done it without this community in the way y'all support me and y'all pour into me.
1:13.3	I'm not going to cry in the first minute of the podcast. But I really do want to thank all
1:20.3	of y'all. I really do appreciate you. I'm usually better at respond to the comments.
1:26.0	So everybody who love a comment, thank you.
1:28.3	It has been so busy since I have been back just with my own life child.
1:32.9	You know, when you leave home, when I leave home for two or three days and I miss a weekend,
1:37.4	it's like, oh, Lord, all these things I need to do.
1:40.6	And during the week, I already have a lot to do.
1:42.2	But anyway, I appreciate y'all very much.
1:46.8	This episode is going to air the Tuesday before Mother's Day. And so that's what we're going to
1:57.9	talk about. I was going to try and figure out a smooth way to come into it. But I was like, there's really no way. And I have some notes on my phone to kind of help me stay grounded and focused in this conversation. It has been a couple of years since I've done a mother wound podcast. I've only done one. And I think that was
2:20.3	like maybe 2022, 23 because when Mother's Day comes, I just drop off. You know, and it's not
	...

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