What are you up to, Alice?

For my sins, I'm doing a bit of admin and scrolling through the British Scandal inbox.

My goodness, what a quagmire.

But what I will say is that tonking has taken off amongst the British scandal community.

Okay.

Do we mean the use of the word or the practice itself?

We have put Tonking back on the map.

For people that don't remember, Matt's preferred term for the act of lovemaking is

tonking.

And I don't know if the rates of the activity have gone up, but people are loving the use

of the word. So if you are Tonking, get in touch, British Scandal at Wondry.com. At what point? Let us know. Mid-tonk. Send us a voice note. Now, I presume Sarah, who's been in touch, wasn't tonking at the time of sending this, but it's not clear. Her name is Sarah Overson Lowe, which sounds like a British scandal character. Oh, that's a great name. She sounds

powerful and mean. Well, she moved from Birmingham to Devon. How would you embody that voice?

Oh, God. Will she go, uh, oh, like a bit of Tonkin in the morning, my lover? Seamless, seamless. I worried that you just mashed two very, very on the nose accents together, but you have proved me wrong yet again. So she sent us a pick. She saw Tonkin out in the wild. It's okay, it's okay if we don't need to call the police. Apparently Tonkin is the name of a logistics company, and she sent us this lovely picture of it on a motorway near you. Oh my God. The word is so big on the front of the van. Once you know it's a rude word, it would be like hiring a company called shagging or wanking to move your car. And I would. Another fantastic message from Liz Sinclair from Melbourne.

Don't do the accent.

She sent us a heartwarming pick of a kids book in her local library.

It's a whimsical tale about a young girl on a voyage of discovery.

It looks like she goes to some magical places.

There's some beautiful seagulls on there, a very sweet-looking cartoon fox.

It's called The Extraordinary Adventures of Alice Tonks.

There's a girl on the front with long red hair that looks like you.

Just saying. Just saying it puts it in a whole new light, doesn't it? Do not check that book

out of the library for your children. But I've saved the best until last.

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