Hello everybody, here's my newscaster, Wasta Dilliz, Wasta Dilliz.

Hurricane Ida is really bootcocking Louisiana right now, Mississippi even lost a highway.

Nobody died because nobody lives in Mississippi.

Jake Paul really owned the week.

While we were trying to get a few Americans out of Afghanistan, Jake Paul was making

a trillion dollars fighting Tyron.

It's not Tyrone.

Tyron.

Woodley.

What a piece of shit fight that was.

I want my money back in the way of Yoss.

The Taliban.

It's Taliban Day.

It's Taliban Independence Day over in Afghanistan.

As they host a parade with the booty that we left for them, lots of tanks, lots of

humvees, but they brought their own Toyota like a rock.

How do you say like a rock in Arabic because that's a commercial for Toyota.

This is Long Days and can you tell me Wasta Dilliz?

You know, it's been fun just seeing images of the Taliban having their parade.

You know, there's a Greek Independence Day parade that happens on Fifth Avenue where

the Greeks celebrate their independence from their enslavers, their oppressors, the Turks

of which I am a rape baby of.

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