The 10 Most Subtle Signs of Emotional Abuse in a Christian Marriage - Emotional Abuse 101 | Part 1 [356]

Flying Free

Natalie Hoffman

Emotional, Narcissism, Christianity, Abuse, Religion & Spirituality, Spiritual, Christian, Self-improvement, Education, Divorce, Marriage

5 • 1K Ratings

🗓️ 2 December 2025

⏱️ 29 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Welcome to part one of a brand-new series I’m calling “Emotional Abuse 101: Everything You Need to Know,” because, let’s face it, the church didn’t exactly hand out “How to Spot a Narcissist in Your Youth Group” pamphlets in Sunday school.

In this episode, I’m diving into the 10 most subtle signs of emotional abuse, the kind of signs that don’t leave bruises on your body but do leave bruises on your soul. These are the red flags that fly under the radar, the ones that make you ask “Am I too sensitive?” or “Maybe I am the problem?”

Here are some things we’ll cover in this episode:

The Silent Treatment Special — Why emotional withholding isn't just immature behavior, and the real reason he's using it against you
Mr. Jekyll and Pastor Hyde — What happens when everyone else thinks he's amazing, but you're living with someone completely different at home
Strategic Emotional Sabotage — The shocking pattern behind why your birthdays, holidays, and girls' nights keep getting ruined
Weaponized Vulnerability — How opening your heart becomes ammunition in his hands, and why you're not crazy for feeling betrayed
Dream Crusher Lite™ — The subtle way he makes pursuing your goals absolutely miserable without ever saying "no" outright
Plausible Deniability — Why you're always "too sensitive" or "making assumptions," and how this phrase is actually a manipulation tactic

Read the full show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here

Take a FREE emotional abuse quiz by going to emotionalabusequiz.com. Find out if what you're experiencing is normal Christian marriage stuff...or abuse.

Related Resources:

Was this episode helpful? You may find these two Flying Free episodes equally worthwhile: “Does an Abuser Know They Are Abusive?” and “Nine Tricks Emotional Abuser Use to Pull Us Back Into the Cycle (and six clever ways to respond!)”

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hi, this is Natalie Hoffman of Flying FreeNow.com, and you're listening to the Flying Free
0:07.8	podcast, a support resource for women of faith looking for hope and healing from hidden
0:14.2	emotional and spiritual abuse. Welcome to episode 356 of the Flying Free Podcast.
0:23.5	But this is also part one of a 10-part series that I'm going to do called
0:30.8	Emotional Abuse 101, Everything You Need to Know.
0:35.4	I have been doing this work for years now, walking alongside women
0:39.4	who are trying to make sense of relationships that leave them feeling crazy and confused and
0:47.1	frankly, just totally exhausted. And one of the most common things I hear is this. Well, I don't know if what I'm
0:56.7	experiencing is actually abuse. He doesn't hit me. He doesn't yell all the time. Sometimes
1:02.8	he's really wonderful. And that's exactly what we're going to talk about today. We're going to
1:09.0	talk about the really subtle signs of emotional abuse that most people miss.
1:13.9	The ones that leave you questioning yourself instead of questioning the relationship.
1:19.7	The ones that make you think, maybe I'm just too sensitive.
1:24.3	Maybe I'm actually the problem.
1:27.1	So before we get into the 10 signs, I want to say
1:30.5	something really important. If you are listening to this episode, there's probably a good reason.
1:37.6	Maybe something in your gut has been telling you that something's not right. Maybe you've
1:42.2	been making excuses for behaviors that leave you feeling small.
1:47.3	Maybe you're here because you're finally ready to trust yourself again.
1:52.6	Whatever brought you here, I want you to know that you're not crazy, you're not making it up,
1:58.8	and you know what, you're not alone either.. And you know what?
2:02.0	You're not alone either.
	...

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