Teaching Sons That Every Struggle Is an Opportunity to Grow ft. Ethan Hagner
The Dad Edge Podcast
Larry Hagner
4.8 • 1.6K Ratings
🗓️ 8 October 2025
⏱️ 54 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
In this candid father-son episode of the Dad Edge Podcast, I sit down once again with my son Ethan for a real-time look at what growth, struggle, and emotional awareness look like in the life of a young man. We dive into why ownership is key when navigating life's challenges, how to catch yourself when falling into patterns of blame, and what it takes to shift your state when your mindset is working against you.
This is one of those conversations where nothing is sugarcoated. Ethan opens up about areas where he's felt "off," what he's learned from coaching conversations, and how choosing personal responsibility over defensiveness continues to shape his confidence and leadership.
TIMELINE SUMMARY
[0:00] - Welcoming Ethan back for another check-in
[1:47] - Recognizing emotional off days and calling them out honestly
[3:20] - How state, story, and strategy shape our reality
[5:01] - Catching the victim mindset and flipping the script
[7:14] - Owning mistakes vs. falling into blame or excuses
[9:28] - Ethan on noticing his tone and making intentional corrections
[11:03] - Coaching tools that help interrupt negative spirals
[13:24] - The power of "what's within your control" thinking
[15:46] - Why your energy impacts others and how to shift it
[18:12] - Seeing every hard moment as feedback, not failure
[20:05] - Final thoughts on presence, responsibility, and consistent growth
5 KEY TAKEAWAYS
1. Awareness Is the First Step Toward Change
Before you can shift your behavior or attitude, you've got to recognize when something's off. Awareness creates the gap between reaction and choice.
2. Victimhood Kills Ownership and Confidence
It's easy to blame circumstances or others when things go wrong—but choosing responsibility is what builds maturity and trust in yourself.
3. Your State Impacts Your Story
How you feel physically and emotionally influences the narrative you create in your mind. Shifting your state can instantly shift your mindset.
4. Tone Matters in Leadership
Even when your intentions are good, your tone can undermine the message. Ethan shares how he's learning to adjust and communicate more effectively.
5. Every Struggle Is an Opportunity to Grow
Whether it's a rough day, a mistake, or a mindset spiral—each one holds the potential for learning, growth, and leadership if you lean into it.
LINKS & RESOURCES
- thedadedge.com/legendarybook
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25 Questions to Spark Connection With Your Partner: https://www.thedadedge.com/25questions
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The Dad Edge Alliance: https://www.thedadedge.com/alliance
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Podcast Show notes: thedadedge.com/1385
If this episode helped you think differently about growth, mindset, or your role as a father, please rate, follow, review, and share the podcast. These moments of connection and reflection can change everything.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Dad Edge podcast. The Dad Edge movement creates leaders of men, leaders of families, and leaders of communities. We will not only impact this generation of fathers, but the next generation as well. The kids we are raising will have better chances and odds stacked in their favor because of the amazing example |
| 0:21.2 | that their fathers emulated for them. We are here to change the world. We are here to change |
| 0:27.6 | relationships. We are here to positively disrupt this generation of fathers so no man goes to their |
| 0:33.6 | grave with regret. We disrupt the drift of busyness and replace it with razor-focused intention, |
| 0:40.3 | passion, purpose, and direction. |
| 0:43.7 | We are the Dad Edge, |
| 0:45.7 | and we're here to change the game. |
| 0:47.8 | We're here to change the game. |
| 1:05.8 | I don't know. Pressure. Pressure, pressure, pressure, pressure. It is everywhere. |
| 1:12.8 | And for a 19-year-old, it's deadlines. It's friend groups. It's sports. And the big, scary question for a 19-year-old, it's deadlines, it's friend groups, it's sports. And the big scary question for a 19-year-old is, what in the heck is next? |
| 1:18.9 | But hey, for us, dads, it's providing for our family. |
| 1:22.6 | It's leading in our marriages and somehow not dropping the ball when it feels like the way |
| 1:27.2 | the world is on our shoulders. That ball when it feels like the way the world |
| 1:27.7 | is on our shoulders. That's what it's like for a dad. But here's the truth. Pressure is not going |
| 1:32.9 | away. It's not going away for Ethan at 19 years old. It's not going away for me at 30 years old. |
| 1:43.3 | Kidding. It's not going away for me at 50 years old. |
| 1:47.7 | And the real question is, do we let it crush us, right? |
| 1:51.1 | Or do we learn to turn it into fuel? |
| 1:53.8 | A lot of us out there, when we're faced with pressure to perform or faced with pressure |
| 1:59.5 | to show up or obligations or whatever sometimes we can |
| 2:02.9 | crumble and sometimes we can rise to the occasion it just all depends on what we do with it and today |
| 2:08.7 | Ethan and I are pulling back the curtain on how this impacts our lives and how pressure shows up in our |
... |
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