TCND: Church Hopping Update and Prevention Magazine (Beef Wellington at the Pitch-In) [The Comedian Next Door]

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4.6 • 949 Ratings

🗓️ 11 August 2025

⏱️ 46 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Welcome to the table--watch out for flying bits of chewed carrot and shoes...

John is still unwelcome at his home church, so he gives an update on his church-hopping travels. WHAT DO YOU DO when you have nothing to do at church???

Next: Luke has a great idea for how to make an impression at the church pitch-in. But only you would get the joke, Neighbor! Everyone else would just be confused...

...and that reminds us of our late friend, Hank McGill!

Then: You have homework, Neighbor! You need to send us your best punchlines for Hank's infamous set-up... It goes: "A guy called and asked if I wanted a subscription to Prevention Magazine, and I said: ___________________________"

LATER: You know, lots of churches pay to bring in a comedian for a night of laughs, but having one as a member of your congregation isn't always delightful. When you order the caviar for a fancy restaurant, it feels high-value and cool. But if you just bring caviar to the average church pitch in, it's just going to land on the floor under the highchairs, with the green beans, while everyone eats the mac-and-cheese.

That analogy made sense while we were crafting it...

Send your comments (and your punchlines) to [email protected]!

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to the podcast.
0:03.8	Come be part of the conversations that happen around my kitchen table.
0:17.6	He's John Brandion and he's been a stand-up comic for more than 30 years.
0:21.3	She's Amanda McKinney and she's been my daughter for her whole life.
0:25.3	Our family believes laughter is a gift from God. We often discover it while discussing
0:29.3	culture, faith, and family. So go ahead and pull up a chair, neighbor. Can I call you Carl?
0:34.4	There's plenty of room here for you.
0:41.7	Hey, Carl, welcome to our little podcast.
0:43.3	We're, uh... That crunching you here in the background is not a goat or a horse.
0:48.1	That's carrots.
0:48.8	It's just Luke McKinney eating carrots out of a bag.
0:53.2	It's got a whole bag of carrots. What's the proper delivery system
0:57.3	for carrots like that? You usually see them on a tray. Oh, the carrots? Yeah. Usually don't people
1:04.4	put carrots on some sort of a plate or a... Yeah. Well, this is a man who, like this applesauce, he may ask me to pass this to him a little later. I have a spoon and I'm eating directly out of the jar with a spoon. I noticed that. I was going to comment on that next. He will dump it into his open mouth like it's a big old water. Like it's a beverage. Applesauceauce is a beverage. So, yeah, it's unsweetened apple sauce. It's a whole quart of it, I believe. Ew, I'm not eating unsweetened apples sauce. It's two pounds. Why? It's just apples. It's not like it's not sweet. They just have an added sugar. Apples are sweet. Mott's cinnamon applesauce or nothing.
1:46.6	You're eating carrots. Those are not sweetened.
1:50.1	That's true. Unsuited carrots.
1:51.5	I don't need everything sweetened.
1:53.3	You eat unsweetened carrots.
1:55.4	Just so you know, everyone, we may have to sing the rest of this podcast episode.
2:00.0	Because Bridger's at large.
2:01.3	Because Bridger is needy, but he loves music.
2:04.8	Remember the early days of this podcast?
	...

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