TAM+ Episode 42: From Self-Blame to Self-Compassion: Breaking the Addiction Shame Cycle
The Addicted Mind Podcast
Duane Osterlind, LMFT
4.8 • 621 Ratings
🗓️ 31 October 2024
⏱️ 17 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Are you your own worst enemy in recovery? This episode tackles the hidden barrier that keeps many people stuck in addiction - a harsh inner critic. Hosts Duane and Eric Osterlind explore how self-blame can sabotage recovery efforts and share research-backed strategies for developing self-compassion. Drawing from Dr. Kristen Neff's groundbreaking research, they explain why being kind to yourself isn't just "feel-good talk" but a powerful tool for lasting change. The hosts break down practical steps to transform your inner dialogue and explain why self-compassion actually leads to better accountability than harsh self-criticism. Whether you're in recovery or supporting someone who is, this episode offers actionable tools to break free from shame and build lasting resilience.
Download: From Self-Blame to Self-Compassion Recovery Worksheet.
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Key Topics
- The difference between self-compassion and self-excuse
- Research evidence supporting self-compassion in recovery
- How shame fuels addiction cycles
- Practical steps to develop self-compassion
- The role of community support in building self-compassion
- Connection between self-compassion and accountability
- Tools for identifying and transforming your inner critic
Key Timestamps
[00:01:23] Why we're kinder to others than ourselves
[00:03:35] Understanding the trap of self-blame
[00:05:02] Introduction to Dr. Kristen Neff's research
[00:07:34] Self-compassion vs. making excuses
[00:08:23] Practical steps for developing self-compassion
[00:11:36] The importance of common humanity
[00:14:31] Different timelines for change
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Addicted Mind Plus, the podcast where recovery, mental health, and wellness take the front seat. |
| 0:07.3 | I'm Dwayne Austerland, and joining me is my co-host, Eric Osterland, known for his insightful work on the Stuck Brain podcast. |
| 0:14.3 | In each episode, we'll dive into actionable, small steps to help those in recovery journey further along the path to wellness. |
| 0:22.3 | Our conversations are designed to be concise, typically around 15 minutes, though we may |
| 0:27.0 | occasionally delve deeper when the topic demands it. Our goal to provide you with practical |
| 0:32.0 | advice grounded in real experiences and expert insights to empower your recovery journey. So whether you're on a |
| 0:39.3 | break, on a walk, or just taking a moment for yourself, join us as we explore the many |
| 0:44.1 | facets of recovery and mental health, one small step at a time. This is the Addicted Mind Plus, |
| 0:50.3 | where your journey to wellness gets an extra boost. So let's get started. |
| 1:00.3 | All right, everyone. Welcome to our next episode of the Addicted Mind Plus. Our episode today is about moving from self-blame to self-compassion and developing a kinder inner voice. |
| 1:12.9 | Yeah, this is going to be a great episode. |
| 1:15.4 | I know a lot of people struggle with this. |
| 1:17.5 | This is hard to do, but it moves the needle so much. |
| 1:21.2 | So I'm excited to talk about this one. |
| 1:23.2 | Yeah, and I think everybody really struggles with this in some way. I don't know if we're |
| 1:30.1 | hardwired for this or this is just part of the human condition, but over and over I see it. |
| 1:36.5 | We can be so much kinder to others, but when it comes to ourselves, oh my gosh, you know, |
| 1:43.4 | we can say, you messed up again. |
| 1:45.9 | You'll never get this right. |
| 1:47.8 | You're a horrible person. |
| 1:49.8 | What a failure you are. |
| 1:52.1 | And you would never say that to a friend. |
... |
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