TAM+ EP 56: Episode Why Letting Go of Addiction Feels Like Losing a Best Friend
The Addicted Mind Podcast
Duane Osterlind, LMFT
4.8 • 621 Ratings
🗓️ 13 February 2025
⏱️ 22 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Have you ever felt guilty for missing your addiction, even though you know it was destroying your life? You're not alone. In this powerful episode of The Addicted Mind Plus, hosts Duane and Eric explore the often-overlooked emotional journey of grieving your addiction during recovery. They dive deep into why letting go of addiction can feel like losing a best friend – even when that friend was toxic. Using Elizabeth Kubler-Ross's famous five stages of grief as a framework, they explain why these feelings are completely normal and how to process them without shame. Whether you're in recovery yourself or supporting someone who is, this episode offers vital insights into the complex emotional landscape of addiction recovery and provides practical tools for moving forward. Learn why missing your addiction doesn't make you weak – it makes you human.
• The five stages of grief in addiction recovery: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance
• Why missing your addiction is a normal part of recovery
• Understanding what you're really grieving (substance, rituals, identity)
• How to process grief and loss in recovery without shame
• The importance of community support during the grieving process
• Practical strategies for moving through grief in recovery
• Tools and resources for processing addiction-related grief
[00:01:06] Introduction to loss and grief in recovery
[00:04:00] Elizabeth Kubler-Ross's five stages of grief explained
[00:09:54] The dangerous bargaining stage in recovery
[00:12:00] Understanding the depression stage
[00:15:12] What we're really grieving in recovery
[00:18:35] Healthy ways to process addiction-related grief
[00:20:33] Resources and support options available
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Addicted Mind Plus, the podcast where recovery, mental health, and wellness take the front seat. |
| 0:07.3 | I'm Dwayne Austerland, and joining me is my co-host, Eric Osterland, known for his insightful work on the Stuck Brain podcast. |
| 0:14.3 | In each episode, we'll dive into actionable, small steps to help those in recovery journey further along the path to wellness. |
| 0:22.3 | Our conversations are designed to be concise, typically around 15 minutes, though we may |
| 0:27.0 | occasionally delve deeper when the topic demands it. Our goal to provide you with practical |
| 0:32.0 | advice grounded in real experiences and expert insights to empower your recovery journey. So whether you're on a |
| 0:39.3 | break, on a walk, or just taking a moment for yourself, join us as we explore the many |
| 0:44.1 | facets of recovery and mental health, one small step at a time. This is The Addicted Mind Plus, |
| 0:50.3 | where your journey to wellness gets an extra boost. So let's get started. |
| 0:59.0 | All right, everybody, welcome to the Addicted Mind. Plus, we're on to another episode. |
| 1:01.9 | I'm here with my co-host. |
| 1:04.4 | Eric Osterland, great to be here. |
| 1:06.4 | Excited about today's episode. |
| 1:08.6 | And my name's Dwayne Osterland. |
| 1:11.9 | And we've got a great topic today that we're going to talk about. |
| 1:18.4 | I think anyone in recovery from addiction is going to be dealing with this issue. |
| 1:30.6 | And we're going to talk about the profound sense of loss and grief that often comes with letting go of addiction. It's something we often miss, |
| 1:36.3 | but I see it over and over again when I'm working with people who are struggling with addiction. And it might sound something like this. I know this addiction is killing me. I know |
| 1:41.8 | this addiction is causing so much pain in my life. I know this addiction is killing me. I know this addiction is causing so much pain in my life. I know this |
| 1:45.8 | addiction is destroying my family, destroying my relationship, but sometimes I miss it. Sometimes |
| 1:54.7 | I wish I could have it. And then they asked me, does that make me a bad person? What's wrong with me for wanting to have my |
| 2:05.2 | addiction in my life? And oftentimes, if you're in recovery, these words will resonate with you. |
... |
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