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No Dunks

SQUAD | The Perfect Mascot

No Dunks

iHeartPodcasts

Sports, Comedy, Basketball

4.94.8K Ratings

🗓️ 22 June 2020

⏱️ 53 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

On today's ep. of SQUAD, the guys attempt to build "The Perfect Mascot" from categories including appearance, signature gag, mentor, NBA player nemesis, and name. Who/what would you have drafted? Share your picks in the comments!

Transcript

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0:00.0

No business leader wakes up thinking, gee, I hope I can make some huge trade-offs today.

0:05.8

And yet that's exactly what most security solutions ask of you. Trade speed for safety,

0:10.7

user experience for control, trade keeping things simple for keeping them secure. Not so with

0:16.8

Octa. Octa gives you a unified solution to protect identity.

0:23.9

No friction, no frustration, no compromises.

0:26.7

Security that's a launch pad instead of a limiter?

0:27.8

It's possible.

0:29.1

It's Octor.

0:30.4

The Ucta.

1:35.3

Music Good morning, sweet world, and welcome to the No Dunks Podcast Series Squad, the show where we draft teams like were the general manager, the only catch, that very specific draft pool we're working from. I'm Jaye Skeets and joining us from their high-tech conference rooms. We've got Tasks. We got Trey. We got Lee. And we have our super producer, JD. Guys, before we get to drafting, a little housekeeping, email us your NBA questions and comments to no dunks at theathletic.com. We'll be stepping on the beach a little later this week. Follow us on social media, both Twitter and Instagram at No Dunks Inc. And you know we're on Facebook at Facebook.com slash no dunks Inc. Well, I guess it's official. We're now on Facebook. All right, today's squad. The theme, it's all about mascots. A person, an animal, an object, adopted by a group as a symbolic figure in sports, the hope is they bring you some good luck.

1:39.3

So seeing as its mascot blitz, we get the athletic.

1:41.5

We figured we should get it on the fun.

1:45.2

It is time to draft the perfect mascot, okay?

1:48.5

As always, we have five different categories to draft from.

1:52.5

In the first round, we'll be drafting the look of your mascot, guys.

1:54.3

It's appearance, okay?

1:59.2

You'll be like hijacking another mascot's entire costume, all right?

2:34.9

Best part about this category, all sports are in play. Lee, I don't know. Do they have mascots in cricket? Do we know that? Not in the traditional form of cricket. I'm trying to think of this new 2020 game that they play if they have mascots there. But certainly not in that test cricket. You're not going to see any mascots out there. Well, look, they're in play. All sports are in play. So if you want an NFL team's mascot, you want a baseball team's mascot, whatever, you can draft. Let me ask, what if Lee wanted to create a mascot for a cricket team? Nope, nope, you've got to take somebody's mascot. Oh, no, I'm not, I'm not doing that, no way.

2:38.6

Why can't you create an animal that doesn't exist, or I'll just make it up anyways.

2:38.9

Go ahead.

2:40.6

No one follows the rules anyway.

2:42.5

This is completely pointless when I do these.

...

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