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The Daily Show: Ears Edition

Sports in the Time of Coronavirus - Baseball Season Begins & The Washington Football Team Is Born

The Daily Show: Ears Edition

Comedy Central

Comedy, News, Daily News

4.214.2K Ratings

🗓️ 2 August 2020

⏱️ 16 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

L.A. Clippers player Lou Williams is quarantined after visiting a strip club, the Washington Football Team rebrands, and MLB adds fake crowd noise to its broadcasts. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0

You're listening to Comedy Central.

0:02.6

BAM!

0:03.6

Major League Baseball.

0:12.0

America's leading metaphor for how far you went during a hook-up.

0:16.2

Just four days after the season started with a record four million viewers tuning in.

0:20.8

It looks like the season is already at risk.

0:23.2

With a report today that at least 14 players and coaches on the Miami Marlins have tested

0:27.9

positive for coronavirus.

0:29.9

This is a real blow because the league had been trying literally everything it could

0:34.4

think of to try and stay safe.

0:37.2

There's so many things different about Major League Baseball this season.

0:40.6

The pirates lived to wrap up their first series of the season at St. Louis on Sunday and

0:46.1

check this out.

0:47.1

Your home played umpire tosses, a player from the pirates.

0:50.0

So new manager Derek Shelton goes out there and new rules.

0:53.9

You have to social distance and mask up to argue.

0:58.0

Corona's really changed our lives.

0:59.7

Hand me my mask is the new hold my earrings.

1:02.6

I mean seriously, props to these two because this is an expert demonstration on what it

1:07.5

means to take coronavirus seriously.

1:09.8

Because yes, these guys wanted to fight but they also know that coronavirus is waiting

1:14.4

to beat both of them up.

...

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