Hey deserving listeners, today I'm going to answer patron emails, so let's get into it.

This first emails from an anonymous patron identifies as he, him.

He says, I am in graduate school in a marriage of family therapy program and of course our first mission is understanding ourselves right

So let me ask you a question. So this is a long email, but I think it's worth reading.

Your description during a recent podcast of when you were talking about borderline behaviors,

your description of people with high emotional intuition felt like you were describing me.

Others would describe me this way too.

Your analogy of a giant emotional satellite dish is exactly the way I would describe it.

There are blind spots as you describe some distortions and it is very difficult to turn down

or turn off.

So just chiming in here and I don't remember talking about this

specifically but I can imagine saying something along the lines of, I think someone was writing in and they're asking

about empathy, you know, there's certain people who identifies their empaths and they are self-identify as someone who's very good at picking up other people's emotions.

And what I was talking about is there's a number of roads to that, but one of the main roads

that I've seen is that when you're

relationally traumatized in a way growing up early in life you learn to cope

with that potentially by paying very close attention to other people's emotional states because your ability to game the system in order to get your needs bet depends on your ability to notice other people's emotional states, particularly your parents.

And so early in life, say one-year-old, two-year-old, three-year-old, you develop neuronal connections

that are highly perceptive to that and are not a chosen awareness.

You don't have any choice in the matter.

You don't have to focus on it just becomes

automatic and so going on with his email here

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