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Lovers and Friends with Shan Boodram

S2 Ep109: Tika Sumpter Breaks Down What Sex Education Looks At Home

Lovers and Friends with Shan Boodram

LOVERS by shan

Sexuality, Society & Culture, Relationships, Health & Fitness

55.5K Ratings

🗓️ 5 March 2025

⏱️ 45 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

What kind of relationship with sex do we want young people to have? In this episode myself and Tika Sumpter, known for her multifaceted career as an actor and creator, explore this question as parents and as people reparenting themselves. In this episode Tika shares her compelling personal story that shaped her approach to intimacy and education. Growing up in a Christian household, discussions about sex were often avoided or framed solely around negative consequences. This instilled fear and confusion about her own sexuality during her teenage years. In her twenties, Tika found herself navigating relationships without a clear understanding of her body or pleasure, often pretending to have a sexual IQ she hadn't yet developed. Therapy became a turning point, helping her reconnect with herself and embrace her sexual identity.

Now, as a mother, Tika is determined to break this cycle for her daughter. On this episode, she opens up about her journey and shares how she is redefining sex and intimacy education in her household. Her goal is to raise her daughter to be a sexually and relationally competent individual, equipped with the tools and knowledge Tika wishes she had earlier in life.

Tika is best known for her work on screen but did you know she also makes children’s content? She is the creator of The Adventures of Curious Cove, a podcast anchored by the beloved series Ella the Curious. This project reflects her passion for storytelling and education, making complex topics accessible and engaging for young audiences.

Thank you Bumble
This episode of Lovers is presented by Bumble who encourages you to date your way. There is a world where you can date exactly who you want, however you want. So date now, on Bumble.

Thank you Tika
Preorder Tika's upcoming book!
https://tinyurl.com/I-Got-It-From-My-Mama-Book
https://www.instagram.com/tikasumpter
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/adventures-of-curiosity-cove/id1760587303

Age by Age Sexual Development Guide
As per Tika’s request…
loversbyshan.com/quizzes

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Lovers Community
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https://www.loversbyshan.com/community

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

I've been in therapy for a long time, but I've had to deal with all my stuff because I've never, all my, just talking about sex or like, why don't I want to do this or why do I want to do that?

0:10.8

Or I didn't have names for or vocabulary for because nobody spoke to me about it.

0:15.0

Ladies and gentlemen, Tika Sumpter. Welcome.

0:16.6

Favorite Tika something. Welcome.

0:19.2

Tika. Is that short for like like Martika or something like that?

0:21.6

Absolutely not.

0:22.6

It's short for Euphemia Latique Sumpter.

0:25.6

When you said you were a late bloomer in a parent's mind, that's a success story.

0:30.6

It's a success story.

0:31.6

But for me it's not.

0:32.6

Just because you're not speaking about it doesn't mean the feelings and the things are not happening.

0:36.6

You start feeling shame.

0:38.3

Like, I'm doing something wrong.

0:39.3

This isn't a good part of me.

0:41.3

For me, as an adult, I felt very mute in that way.

0:44.3

Didn't know what I liked.

0:46.3

I didn't even know how to be intimate and talking.

0:48.3

I remember even having arguments and being quiet and, you know, my exes being like,

0:52.3

you don't even say anything like I'll be like

0:55.3

I'll try to do better I don't even know how to function so I feel like when you're not

1:00.8

giving your children the words to function how do you expect them to and be empowered

1:06.9

in all these words that we say as adults how do you expect that same person to be that person

...

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