So I thought about doing this podcast any other way that I'm going to do it and I decided

I can't.

I just have to be honest, you know, I think I've learned over the years of doing this that

first of all, I'm not capable of doing this work if I'm not speaking from my heart and

second of all, every positive feedback I ever get from you guys is because you appreciate

that that's the way I am.

So it's not always easy to show up as who we are though because when who we are is not

something that's making us feel good, it's just so hard to be a person that has to be

authentic and seen and raw and vulnerable but today I have to do that because I've had

such a bad week.

I've had such a bad week because I first and foremost as you often hear, I'm a mother

and when my children suffer I can't breathe and you know I am usually like all over social

media.

I'm really, really active on my Instagram page at NJSACs if any of you guys want to come

visit me, follow me there.

I'm really like I just, I do a big Instagram story and I do fun stuff with blue all the

time and I, you know, share it with you guys my kids' lives and I've literally not done

anything on social media for days.

I've just been so down and the reason I've been down without getting into too many details

because I do respect the privacy of my children but without getting into too much detail, my

youngest daughter, Charlotte, was supposed to attend a two week ballet intensive camp,

you know, as it were, even though it's more than a camp.

...