This weekend, RetroNots, the most romantic episode ever.

Hi everyone, welcome to RetroNots episode 391.

I looked it up in advance this time, I know the number.

It's 391. This is a patron request episode and a patron exclusive episode.

It's all patrons all the way down, kind of like Discworld, but instead of turtles, it's patrons.

This episode comes to us by request of someone pseudonymous.

Sometimes they emailed me as Chris Hansen and sometimes as AAK and I don't think either of those

are actually their real name. But whatever the case, this person asked more than a year ago

for us to talk about romance of the three kingdoms. That's what we're doing tonight.

Many, many moons later. This has been a long, a long brewing episode, one that's been a great

challenge to make it come together. Just because it's really hard to find RetroNots regulars

who want to talk about romance of the three kingdoms or CoA Games in general.

It's even one of the old RetroNots veterans who has many times talked about romance of the

three kingdoms and other CoA games when I asked him. He was like, I can't do that.

It's challenging because I'm not good at these games. I suck immensely at all of CoA's games.

The action games, the simulation games, the romance games, the porn games. I'm just terrible at all

of them. We're just going to kind of wing it. Thankfully, I was able to put out a call for help

through the Greenlit podcast networks Slack. Two heroes stepped up to save the day.

I forgot their names. It's like Lou Bay and Gwanyu and someone else.

We're like the three brothers of podcasting right here. We swore in a sacred vow.

Now we're going to take down Satsau. Please introduce yourselves. Let's start with

the newcomer to the show. Someone who's never been on RetroNots before.

...