4.8 • 7.5K Ratings
🗓️ 14 April 2021
⏱️ 55 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
On Episode 389, Ross and co-host Jared Borislow discuss seasonal fitness cycles, awkward consumer interactions like buying ammunition, the worst tattoos in history including "beautiful alien scars" on Elon Musk's wife Grimes, the death and deviousness of Bernie Madoff, the spotted sea hare, and more.
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0:00.0 | Lensch, lensch, lensch, lensch, lensch, lensch, lensch, lensch, lensch, lensch, lensch, lensch, lensch, lensch, lensch, lensch. |
0:10.5 | It's the rust bowl of my gas! |
0:14.2 | So, we are back. My name is Ross Bolin and I'm here with Jared Boroslow, my loving furry and generally unkempt co-host, Jared Howes Your Ass. |
0:24.4 | My ass is good. It's been sitting in this seat for 45 minutes now. |
0:27.6 | Yeah, took me a minute to get here. |
0:31.0 | There were issues. The house alarm went off while I was in an Uber that then had to turn around. |
0:36.6 | And then I had to get another Uber. It's this whole story. It doesn't matter. You didn't ask, but my ass hurts. |
0:43.1 | I worked out legs yesterday for the first time in over a month. Ross fit admittedly, fell apart in March. |
0:50.2 | Life always finds a way to derail the routine, but we're back on track and by we, I mean me, and by back on track, |
0:56.0 | I mean I can't feel my legs and poop blood this morning from doing three sets of 10 squats with relatively lightweight yet today. |
1:02.5 | Look, everyone knows I have chicken legs, okay? |
1:06.6 | I'm the chicken leg guy. Ha ha! Look at his legs. They're so skinny like a stork. |
1:12.6 | Look at the flamingo man, mommy. |
1:15.1 | Daddy, how do his knees work? |
1:17.3 | Treetrunk leg having obese kids judging a grown man's legs. It's preposterous. |
1:22.1 | But this is the cycle I have to endure. Every winter, I work my ass off to get in great shape. |
1:27.9 | Then by the time spring comes around, life has beaten the shit out of me to the degree that I lose my routine entirely. |
1:34.4 | And by the time I can actually be out in the sun wearing anything that might even hint that I give a shit about working out, |
1:40.2 | I'm a pasty chicken leg regular, larp looking white dude again. And that's the cycle that's my life. |
1:46.8 | Yeah, I like how you said larp instead of narp. |
1:50.2 | That was funny to me. Larp. |
1:52.2 | Larp is live action roleplay. |
... |
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