PATRIMONY DELAYED: 2/4 A Round of Golf with My Father: The New Psychology of Exploring Your Past to Make Peace with Your Present, by William Damon
The John Batchelor Show
John Batchelor
4.5 • 2.8K Ratings
🗓️ 20 August 2023
⏱️ 9 minutes
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Summary
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PATRIMONY DELAYED: 2/4 A Round of Golf with My Father: The New Psychology of Exploring Your Past to Make Peace with Your Present, by William Damon
Viewing our past through the eyes of maturity can reveal insights that our younger selves could not see. Lessons that eluded us become apparent. Encounters that once felt like misfortunes now become understood as valued parts of who we are. We realize what we’ve learned and what we have to teach. And we’re encouraged to chart a future that is rich with purpose.
In A Round of Golf with My Father, William Damon introduces us to the “life review.” This is a process of looking with clarity and curiosity at the paths we’ve traveled, examining our pasts in a frank yet positive manner, and using what we’ve learned to write purposeful next chapters for our lives.
For Damon, that process began by uncovering the mysterious life of his father, whom he never met and never gave much thought to. What he discovered surprised him so greatly that he was moved to reassess the events of his own life, including the choices he made, the relationships he forged, and the career he pursued.
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| 0:54.0 | And now Bill Damon, born 1944. |
| 1:01.0 | In 1948 he lost his grandfather, his father's father. |
| 1:06.0 | He did have a visit that he remembers with his grandmother who was a Yankee |
| 1:11.0 | and spoke crisply and candidly of her son who had disappointed her. |
| 1:20.0 | However, at this point the young Bill Damon doesn't have the story laid out in the fashion we've had. |
| 1:27.0 | So the revelations begin on and off sometime, my guest bill, your story. |
| 1:33.0 | Sometime when you found yourself no longer in Brockton, Massachusetts, facing Brockton High School and the future after that. |
| 1:42.0 | But at the end of her academy, when did the revelations in your memory bill, when did the revelations begin? |
| 1:48.0 | That you were strangely following your father's footpaths never having met him? |
| 1:55.0 | Well, number one, when I was young and that goes all the way to my college years, I really knew nothing about my father |
| 2:06.0 | and didn't even want to think about him very much. |
| 2:10.0 | I had some sense that I needed to make it on my own and I didn't want to go around feeling sorry for myself. |
| 2:18.0 | So when anybody would ask me about where my father was, I would just repeat what my mother kept telling me, which was, quote, he was missing in World War II. |
| 2:29.0 | It was like a mantra. |
| 2:31.0 | And that's all allowed myself to think about. |
| 2:33.0 | I think probably because I really wanted to spend for myself and I didn't want to, I didn't want to sink into O.D. |
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