this one's for you tonight

okay let's get started

oh my god who can forget when will smith doubled over and laughed or almost crying laughing at the

original g i jane he's like gai jane that's hilarious he goes he goes uh yeah a lot of people

don't remember what his joke was uh chris rock he goes, he goes, he goes, G.I. Jane called, uh, what, what, he goes, he goes, uh, look at, he goes, what he goes, he goes, look at, uh, jada's head.

Um, G.I. Jane called. They want their hairstyle back. And Will Smith was like, you could tell he thought that was the funniest thing he's ever heard in his life. But then two minutes of laughter turned into that rage-filled slap. I'll never forget. I'll never forget where I was when I watched that slap. I was sitting with a bunch of my friends watching the Oscars.

Same. He could have been killed. He could have been killed. If that slap landed

not on the cheek and it would have been in the temple of his head, Chris Rock would have died in front of

our eyes. I'll never get over it. It's been six years and I'll never, ever get over it.

It's really? So I know that it's been done to death, but just the fact that he won that night.

So like we all had to like see him reenter and everyone had to just like applaud for him was the craziest thing.

Like what are the odds that that happened with the best actor winner of the night?

Like how crazy. Is it more or less crazy than La La Land Moonlight? Crazier. Crazy. I don't even remember. I mean, I remember. I felt bad for what's his name, Warren Beatty. He was like, give me that goddamn card. Faye, you dumb bitch, it says Emma Stone. Yeah, yeah. He was like, he was like, I'll take the card.

I know how to read the fucking Oscars.

I've been doing it for 70 years. And, but that, he was like, oh, no way to it is fucked up. He goes, oh, fuck. I don't know how to read this. I'm completely fucked up here. That one was crazy. That's crazy, you know, but that had just live silly energy.

Whereas the Will Smith thing, like when I was with my friends, we were like, this is a sketch. And I was like, but why would he be cursing and why would they be bleeping out his curse words during a sketch? If they had rehearsed it, you would be- forget. They like pan to like Lepida Nyango and she's like, oh my God. And you're like, wait, this isn't funny.

What the hell?

Yeah.

Yeah, not funny at all.

Chris Rocks, I watched his special after it. It's like, it wasn't very good. I was like, my God. I was like, yeah. Well. We didn't. All right. Oh, okay. And what I liked about this is that Kristen, who I love, more than anyone in the world,

she's sort of acting as Wormtong in Lord of the Rings to the King of Rohan because she's going,

that was bad.

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