Over Explaining As A Trauma Response To Narcissistic Abuse

Trauma & Narcissism Redefined

Caroline Strawson

Narcissisticabuse, Health & Fitness, Narcissist, Self-improvement, Education, Recovery, Mental Health, Trauma

4.8 • 701 Ratings

🗓️ 30 January 2024

⏱️ 16 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Narcissistic abuse causes us to act in so many different ways as a response to the trauma, this is our body creating a protector part of ourselves to try and make us feel safe. One of these protector parts can show up as over-explaining! Do you find it hard to simply say “no” to a request, without going into an essay into why you can’t do something? This is over-explaining, and I was the QUEEN of over-explaining.

What you will learn in this episode:

How our body creates safeguards that hurt us in the long term
Why over-explaining can often make the situation worse
What you can do to feel comfortable in your response to people

I found that the more I tried to explain, the worse I’d make the situation. It’s so common to dig ourselves into a hole the more that we try to explain away our behaviours, and unfortunately, it’s not our fault, it’s our body trying to safeguard ourselves from disappointing our friends and family. In this episode, I’m going to explain why we over-explain and how we can address the root cause of this issue so that we can finally be a reflection of our true selves and not worry about what other people think of us anymore.

Podcast Resources:

Join my FREE Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/thriveafternarcissisticabuse
Access my low cost Narcissistic Trauma Recovery Programme https://go.carolinestrawson.com/heal-the-trauma-of-narcissistic-abuse
Connect with me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinestrawson/
Find me on TikTok!: https://www.tiktok.com/@carolinestrawson
My website: https://www.carolinestrawson.com/

Transcript

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0:00.0	Welcome to the narcissistic abused and trauma recovery podcast. I'm Caroline Strawson and I'll be sharing with you awareness, understanding and education about the devastating effects of narcissistic abuse. I've been exactly where you are right now and this podcast is a beacon of hope for you to know that you
0:22.8	are believed, you are seen, you are heard and you are not alone. And my hope for listening to
0:29.6	the podcast is it will help you move from post-traumatic stress to post-traumatic growth
0:35.6	after the trauma of narcissistic abuse because it is possible.
0:40.7	You are enough and you deserve to thrive.
0:46.0	Hi, my amazing friends and a massive welcome to the narcissistic abuse and trauma recovery podcast.
0:52.4	My name is Caroline and as always, it's my pleasure to have you
0:55.4	here, albeit under these challenging situations, aren't they? And, you know, whether you're a regular
1:02.0	listener, welcome back, or maybe you're a new listener and you've just found my podcast and all I would
1:07.0	say is after you've listened to this one, please go and binge and listen to the others.
1:11.6	Because I've been where you are and I know what it is like to feel like, what is this, narcissistic in my life?
1:17.4	What is this thing?
1:18.4	Does we don't get taught this in schools?
1:20.4	So it's a lot of information and just take your time and know that I understand.
1:25.6	I'm not here to judge anybody because I know it took me years before
1:28.8	me and my ex-husband split up and he left me. So I'm not here to judge anyone who's still in a
1:33.8	relationship, still struggling to move on because I know how tough it is because our nervous system is
1:40.1	actually trying to keep us safe. So if you feel like you're struggling to get out of bed each morning, you're not lazy. That's your nervous system in a freeze response trying to keep us safe. So if you feel like you're struggling to get out of bed each
1:44.4	morning, you're not lazy. That's your nervous system in a freeze response, trying to keep you
1:48.5	save. If you feel like you're getting angry all of the time and you're on edge all of the time,
1:52.9	that's not because you're weak or a failure. It's because your sympathetic nervous system
1:56.9	is trying to protect you and keep you safe. These are all the things that I teach because
	...

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