What up my homies, it's Lisa Biliou and I've got a really, really heart-and-duty episode of Women of Impact for You and guys you may want to link the kids out of the room because we are answering all those questions about sex that you've been too embarrassed to ask which let's face it you shouldn't be by the way but sex is too often seen as a taboo subject and I really, really want to change that and so don't worry I got you I talk about all the embarrassing the funny the myths the lies and you won't believe the knowledge and compassion urologist and pelvic surgeon Dr. Reena Malik has and she's spilling the tea on all the sex myths lies and truths like masturbating will make you live longer come is actually good for you and sex cures, headaches. Are those all real things? Are they actually all lies? Well, Reen is also answering questions like, is it normal to not orgasm every time? How can I tell if he's faking an orgasm? Will socks actually make me climax faster? They are so bizarre. We go deep on all of that. And then we dive into the link between your overall health and your sexual health We talk about what to do if your man has erectile dysfunction because Unfortunately the poor guys sometimes do experience that and finally how your stress is messing with your pleasure and Oh my god, that's just part one of part two of this episode guys So seriously I've learned so much in talking to Dr. Reenah about sex and the sexual health of women and men and guys knowledge is power. So without further ado, let's be more powerful with this episode of Women of Impact. Roughly 68% of women have faked an orgasm, but apparently according to new studies, 31% of men fake orgasms.

If you've slept with three guys, then the chances are a guy has actually faked an orgasm with you. Why the hell would a guy fake an orgasm? And then how do we actually tell that he's faking it? Yeah, there's a lot of misconceptions because we think men always want to have sex, men are always going to orgasm, they're always having pleasure, but it's not actually true. And so, you know, the studies will vary from a third of men to a quarter of men.

Have fattened orgasms at some... orgasm, they're always having pleasure, but it's not actually true. And so, you know, the studies will vary from a third of men to a quarter of men have

faked an orgasm at some point.

Now they're not faking every orgasm, but ultimately, you know, men fake it for a whole variety

of reasons, right?

One, there's a small subset of men like around 10% or less that have delayed ejaculation.

So it may take them a really long time, like over 30 minutes to achieve climax. And so they get frustrated and they just want to finish, right? And they just want to be done with the encounter because they're also starting to like lose enjoyment and the experience because they're getting frustrated by the fact that orgasm is not coming. Now a bunch of men will have issues right the big old man, I feel myself maybe losing the erection or I drank too much or I'm on certain medications that make it difficult for me to climax. And so they will to not make their partner feel bad, just like women do, right? Faking orgasm because they don't want their partner to feel like they're not pleased. They're of course enjoying the encounter, but they're having some issue whether it could be they have true erectile dysfunction or some other issue that's causing them to have difficulty achieving climax. And it doesn't mean they don't like you, it doesn't mean that they are not into the encounter. It just means that at that moment in time, they just couldn't perform like they wanted to. And I hate the word performance because, you know, it makes it seem like men have to put on this show. And I think it adds a lot of stress for them. But really that's what it is for a lot of men.

Is they feel this stress like they're about to go on stage,

like they're about to perform.

And so it can be very stressful.

And so they will sometimes fake it.

Now to answer your second part,

in terms of like how can you tell,

well, not all orgasms will lead to ejaculation.

So there are two separate entities, and sometimes people can orgasm without ejaculation, or they can have an issue where their ejaculation is not coming out. A lot of diabetic men, men who have prostate surgery, will have retrograde ejaculation, meaning that the ejaculate will actually go upwards into the bladder. What? Yes. Yes, instead of going outwards. So yeah, it can absolutely happen that way. And again, it doesn't mean they're not orgasming. It just means that they didn't ejaculate. So those things aside, what typically happens that we know consistently happens with orgasm is that your pelvic muscles will contract. Adirative of 0.8 seconds, you'll have a pelvic floor contraction.

So sometimes you'll feel that. Now, not always. Like you kind of know when you've had in a course and like you feel that sort of movement in your own vagina, right? You feel those contractions. So men are having them too. And so that's really the only surefire way because that's involuntary, meaning you can't control it. it's gonna happen when you orgasm,

whether you want to or not.

I think really the problem with society in general around the world is that we don't talk about sex, right? We don't talk about sex growing up. You don't have these conversations with your parents unless you're in a very progressive household. And then when you get in a relationship with someone, you don't talk about your insecurities with sex. Like we all have insecurities. There's not a single person out there who doesn't feel insecure when they're having sex, at least for the first time, right? Because you're extremely vulnerable to have good sex, you have to be 100% vulnerable. And so you have to be able to talk about the things that make you nervous or anxious or stressed out, because otherwise, they're not going to let you enjoy fully the sexual encounter. And that's the real problem is that we don't talk about sex. We never talk to our partners about sex. So how can we know what they're going through? We've never talked about it, right? And so we're all in our own head, like, oh, I feel this way. Maybe this isn't right for me or maybe something's wrong with me, but maybe your partner is going through something and they don't feel comfortable

talking about it with you. So, opening that dialogue can really overall make for better sex. And that's why I actually love so much what you're doing because you're bringing up things that people aren't talking about, but you're also bringing up things that no one as I've heard of before.

But there's a new study that came out.

I don't know if you've heard about this,

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